Your Prince is in Another Castle
by Rassilon001
Summary: Kimihito and the myriad Monster girls who live in his home stumble across an old manual for a game he used to play, the exciting fantasy adventure of "Catacombs and Chimeras" and decide to pass an afternoon or two playing it themselves. As dice roll and random encounters begin, they're off on a quest to save their beloved Prince from the Forces of Evil and the Wicked Queen.
1. Roll of the Dice

**Disclaimer:  
** I do not own Monster Musume (aka Daily Life with Monster Girls), or any of its associated characters or universe. They are licensed by Sentai Filmworks and MVM Films, who are doubtlessly a lot richer than I shall ever be.

 **Summary:  
** Kimihito and the myriad Monster girls who live in his own stumble across an old manual for a game he used to play, and decide to pass an afternoon playing it themselves. As dice roll and encounters begin, they're off on a quest to save their beloved Prince from the forces of Evil. Rated PG for fantasy adventure.

* * *

It had started out a day like any other at the Kurusu Household. Long before the sun had come up, Kimihito had risen to face the day. As well as cook breakfast. With so many guests staying at his home, he often had to get up quite early to cook enough for all of them. It didn't help they usually had special dietary needs to compliment their unusual monster biology. Extra sausage and bacon for Miia and Papi, some hash browns for Cerea, eggs for Rachnera and Meron (sunny side up and scrambled, respectively), and an extra-large glass of orange juice for Suu. Some of the girls were already waking up and slithering, crawling, cantering, rolling, or otherwise making their way into the kitchen to enjoy the meal.

The red-haired lamia girl, however, ignored the plate in her usual spot and slid around the counter towards the cook. She held something in her hands, but he couldn't quite look, his attention was split between the toaster about to go off and the bacon still sizzling away on the stove in front of him.

"Darling? I wanted to ask you about this thing I found under your bed..." she said.

Kimihito froze, feeling a chill roll up his spine. _Oh no_ , he thought.

 _She'd found them_.

 _Quick. Better say something defensive to downplay the situation_. Turning, he rubbed the back of his head nervously. "Oh, well, you see its perfectly natural for a guy my age to have magazines like those..."

"Magazines?" Miia queried, confused.

Blink. "You uh... you didn't find my stash of Playmonster magazines?"

She shook her head. "Playmonster? What's that?"

 _Only the greatest collection of cute monster girls in the world_ , he thought. _Not that I would know about something like that. I only read it for the articles. I swear!_

"Uh... n-nothing," he said. Rapidly switching topics, he latched onto what was hopefully something less damaging. "So uh, what did you find?" he asked. A ding from the toaster drew his attention to rescue the toast before it burnt.

"Hmmm? Oh these old books," she said, holding them up. "And a lunchbox?"

First setting aside the toast, he then took the tomes from her and set them on a nearby table, recognizing them instantly as he picked up the topmost one. The cover art was fantasy, the typical sword and sorcery image you'd see on a novel. This, however, was a different kind of story. The kind you were a part of. The kind you helped to shape for yourself. "Oh wow, Catacombs and Chimeras," he exclaimed, brushing some accumulated dust off the front cover. It certainly had been a while. "I haven't seen these in _years_."

"What are they?" asked Miia, examining a second tome more curiously. "Some sort of reference guide to monsters?"

He chuckled at that and shook his head, though he could understand her confusion. "It's a game I used to play," he admitted. "We used to have a group back in high school... some of my friends and I. This was actually before the government revealed Monsters to the world..."

"How do you play?" Miia asked, unused to seeing her Darling speak so fondly of his past. Usually, he never spoke of it much at all, and that was fine by her. But if she was going to be a big part of his future (and she _was_ , damnit), she should endeavor to learn more about his past.

"Play? Is it a game?"

Papi popped up beside the countertop, eyeing the books and the lunchbox. Suu slid into the seat beside her, adopting a similar curious expression.

Kimihito smiled, well imagining he must've looked just as enthusiastic as the little troublemakers once upon a time. "It certainly is," he said, showing them the cover of the book. "We had many fun adventures with Catacombs and Chimeras."

Cerea, having just stepped into the living room, paused as she overheard their conversation, trotting over to the kitchen countertop as well. "What's this about Chimeras? Are we expecting trouble?"

Blink. "Don't tell me Chimeras are real too?"

She raised an eyebrow at him, giving him a look that plainly said 'we've seen weirder' and he couldn't disagree with that.

"... no, we're not expecting trouble. I was just explaining the old C&C game we used to play as kids," he replied. He offered her the book in question.

"You mean it's a video game?" asked Cerea, turning the book around, as if expecting to find a disk or cartridge strapped to the back of it. "Is this the user manual?"

His hands gently caught hers. "No no this is really old school. Played with dice and pencil and papers and those little miniature figurines..."

"The ones you have in here?" Miia asked, holding up the small lunchbox.

Popping it open, it did indeed reveal its contents as a number of small lead figurines of fantasy figures: knights and wizards, goblins and orcs and even the odd dragon or two. Some were painted, some were only partially so. Time and wear had flecked some of the color from their features, but even a cursory glance could tell they'd been made with tender loving care.

"You painted these?" asked Cerea, lifting up the figure of a dragon and examining it curiously, mindful of its frail-looking wings. It was very well done for an amateur. His lordship was a truly talented individual.

Rachnea and Mero had wandered in by this time, the arachnea pushing the mermaid's wheelchair up to the kitchen table as they also gathered round to study the careworn items. Mero, in particular, found some older character sheets Kimihito and his friends had used.

"This looks like it could be fun," Miia said. "Can we play?"

"Yeah, play!" Papi agreed, fist upraised.

"Play!" Suu whispered, arm upraised to mimic her partner in crime.

The dark-haired master of the house glanced at the other girls, finding Rachnera nodding thoughtfully and even Mero looking enamored with the idea. Cerea as well.

"You want to play as well?" he asked.

"Mhm!" agreed Mero with a nod of her head.

"It sounds like it could be an enjoyable activity," Cerea stated. "And something we can all take part in, for once."

"I'm in," added Rachnera.

"Well then, if that's the case and you're all in agreement... then sure, we'll play... but the game'll be this weekend," Kimihito added, causing them to come up short.

"Why so far away?" asked Miia. She wanted to play with her Darling _now_.

A smirk stretched across his face. "Because preparations need to be made first."

* * *

Kimihito helped to walk them through character creations.

Rolling the dice for stats was easy enough, though he did also have to explain what each stat did and why it was useful. Like his old group had done before, he allowed some customization, but never more than three points off from the original roll, and always with a sacrifice of points from another stat to fill in one they desired. He also made sure to keep an eye on their roles so they wouldn't be tempted to cheat and give themselves better stats.

For some reason they all kept doing exceptionally well in charisma. And, once he explained it, kept wanting more. Odd, he usually considered that a dump stat not useful for the game. But to each their own style of play, he supposed.

From there, more individual tastes emerged as to what race, class, and profession they'd take in the gameplay world of C&C they'd find. Choosing proficiencies, buying equipment, and all manner of little details they had to look over before they were declared ready to play. He started them out at level five, not wanting to waste their time on mediocre foes and fun, but give them a chance to really delve into the adventure.

* * *

The really interesting part started with Miia presenting her Character Sheet to him.

"A Fighter... Lamia?" he read aloud, glancing up at her curiously.

"Mhm! I saw that sometimes they had classes as well and I thought, that could be fun! Plus it's something I know how to play," she said, wiggling her own tail for emphasis.

"Well, they're usually intended to be NPC's," he explained.

"NPC?"

"Non-Player Characters. Like, people I control."

"Oh," she said, her ears drooping a bit.

He gave her a smile. If it made her happy, who was he to fight against it? "Well, I guess we can make an exception for this," he said, not even bothering to consider the consequences of such a decision would have. But sure enough, moments later Cerea was being approved for a mystical Centaur, and Papi was the proud owner of a fantasy Harpy. Overall, however, this sort of thing wouldn't unduly upset his campaign. And if it made the girls happy, so much the better.

Of course, given that Miia immediately glomped him after making his exception, as was currently coiled around his legs and threatening to crush his hips... he privately resolved to be more careful about just how happy he let them be during the course of the game.

* * *

"You're going to play a wizard, Papi?" he asked, studying her sheet again.

"Mhmm! Papi wants to cast magic spells! Whoosh!" she said, gesturing with her wings.

He chuckled at her enthusiasm, hoping it wouldn't get her into too much trouble. "Well okay... now as a mage you get access to certain spells listed here, but you can only have so many in your spellbook... and you need to pick which ones you start the day with."

"I can't have them all?" she asked, head tilting to the side.

A shake of the head dashed her hopes. "Afraid not. Not how magic works in C&C. Besides, that's a lot of spells. You wouldn't be able to remember them all."

 _Not that she could remember much to begin with_.

He made a point to take her aside later and show her which spells did what and give his general recommendation on which ones to put in her spellbook and which ones to memorize as a general stratagem. And then helped her write things down to show what they were and remind herself what she had available. He made sure to include copies of everything for himself. Naturally, she was drawn to the more destructive ones: fireball, lightning bolt, magical missiles... Papi was going to be dangerous in a random encounter.

Possibly her teammates as well. Fortunately, at least a few of them would be healers... maybe that would offset her destructive capability.

* * *

"A fighter/cleric?"

Cerea nodded solemnly. "I read up on the rules of multiclassing... it seemed to allow this... did I err?" she asked tentatively.

"No, no, nothing like that it's just... they level a lot slower, and with the experience you start with, you won't be very tough. I might have a better idea for you," he said, double-checking her stats and looking through the players manual. "Why not try a Paladin instead?"

"I considered that," she admitted with a frown. "But the rules stated that only a human can be a paladin. As if humans alone can possess the purity of heart to be such great and noble warri-"

"Exception."

"Wha-?"

"I'll make an exception," Kimihito said. "It's my C&C campaign, and I say in this game, Centaurs can be Paladins. I can't think of anyone who could possibly have hearts more pure than they."

Her lips quivered at that, and she brought a hand up to hide her expression as her cheeks went rosy. "My lord..."

"It's a lot of work to start over now but if you need any help..."

She took the manual from him, a bright smile on her face. "I'll get started right away. On a Paladin. And I'll do everything I can to be worthy of this great honor, I swear."

 _Well she definitely has the RP down_ , he thought as she galloped off to start on her new character.

* * *

Suu had picked a druid for her class and, in a surprising move, picked human as her race. Her character sheet had almost no corrections needed. Her stats were excellent, her equipment well chosen, even her choice of weapons and spells were well thought out, as if Suu was a veteran player of the game instead of a newbie who'd never seen an eight-sided die in her life.

Even so, her choices seemed a bit odd to Kimihito. He was half-surprised she hadn't asked to play a slime (he wouldn't even guess where he could find stats for such a thing) or a harpy like Papi. "What inspired this, if I might ask?"

"It felt right," was all she replied with.

It completely escaped his notice that her gaze refused to meet his when she said this.

"Well, uh... everything looks to be in order. Do you have any questions for me?"

She shook her head.

Gently patting the top of her moist head, Kimihito smiled down at the slime girl, who looked rather pleased with the silent praise. But she'd more than earned it. Actually rolling the dice or writing something down wouldn't be easy for her, but they'd secured some waterproof gloves she could employ during the game for those purposes. For the rest, well, she learned at an astonishing rate. By the end of all this, she might even be teaching the Catacomb Master a thing or two.

 _Wouldn't that be interesting?_

* * *

Surprisingly, Meroune Lorelei du Neptune had gone with... a bard.

One of, if not _the_ , single most underappreciated and unloved class choices in the entire game. It was an unexpected choice, and Kimihito found himself questioning just why she'd decided on it. What thought process had led to this decision.

"I will play a wandering minstrel," she explained. "Curious about life above the sea and venturing to the surface to explore the world, wandering it with open arms and a song in my heart..."

"Wow, you've really given a lot of thought to this... you don't have much equipment though," he noted, after examining her character sheet.

"Just enough to get by," she said. "I spent most of it on the protection bracelet that lowers my... armor class, is it?"

Kimihito nodded. "And that's good, but you used up all your gold on it. You don't even have a weapon."

"I know... it's so tragic... I'm liable to be a burden to the party, left behind to suffer some cold, cruel fate... and then if I get lost or separated, with no means to defend myself, my minstrel may perish, and they will all mourn her loss..." she said, starting to hug her arms in an effort to stop from shaking.

Whether from horror or arousal, Kimihito couldn't say for certain. Either way wasn't good.

Instead, he cut off this tragedy waiting to happen right here and now.

"Mero... you need a weapon," he opened the player handbook the appropriate page and held up a pencil for her to write down what she was getting on her character sheet. "Isn't it more tragic if a hero has their weapon break right before they're struck down tragically?"

Blink.

"Oh you're right... okay then, uhm... oooh, I know, maybe I can try using a trident... do I have the weapon proficiencies for that?"

 _All too easy_ , he mused.

* * *

"Uhm... Rachnee-san, is this... truly necessary?" he asked in a strained tone.

Stripped of his shirt and dangling from her rooms ceiling by thin strands of spider webbing, he was starting to feel distinctly uncomfortable. And that chill running down his spine wasn't just from the cold either.

"Just making sure your attention is firmly on the task at hand," she teased, sliding up behind him and pressing her voluptuous frame against his back. He couldn't see properly, but it felt like she'd discarded her top, and now there was absolutely nothing separating their two bodies from one another. He did his best to suppress a full body shudder.

"S-so you're having trouble coming up with a race to play?" he asked, trying to keep his mind focused on the game.

She nodded, even as her razor-sharp fingernails started to caress his chest. "Well I won't do humans, you know that. And I'm not interested in these elves, or dwarves, or... half-lings? I'm just not seeing anything that... speaks to me," Rachnea said, leaning in closer. "Could you recommend something, _honey_?"

As a matter of a fact, he had just the creature in mind. Well, sort of, but at the moment he wasn't about to second-guess himself.

"H-h-have you considered the d-d-drow?"

"Drow?"

"Dark elves," he said, reaching a hand free of his bindings and pulling up the Monster Manual. Flipping through the pages one-handed, he stopped on the appropriate one, showing her the custom artwork of the creatures in question. "Usually they're evil but I've heard lots of stories about ones who break away from them to be good as well."

Rachnera studied the image curiously, blinking all eight of her red eyes as she took in the sight of this 'drow' of which the Catacomb Master spoke.

"Hmmmm... well I do like their armor," she said, admiring the designs of the black metal the character was wearing in the picture. Considering it was drawn to resemble spider-webs, it was no great shock. "But what're they like?"

"Well like I said, most are evil, they live deep underground and practice dark magic... they're convinced they're the greatest of all the races in the world... oh, and they worship spiders," he threw in as an afterthought.

That sealed the deal for her.

"A drow then," she said. And like that, her Drow Cleric was ready to join in the adventure.

"Great! Now uhm... can you let me down then?"

"What's the magic word?" she sing-songed in his ear.

"P-p-please?" he stuttered out.

* * *

 **Authors Notes:  
** Roll 1d6. On a roll of three or higher, please leave behind a good review. On a roll of six, please leave a GREAT review. Critical!

In order to minimize confusion, from here on out the _players_ are referred to by name, while their _characters_ are referred to as class for the duration of their adventure. I didn't feel like coming up with one for each girl with their own descriptive characteristics. In fact, it's probably easier to imagine the characters as looking almost identical to their players. For maximum hilariousness.

Obviously Catacombs and Chimeras is based on Dungeons and Dragons, but renamed such for two reasons. One, I don't want to get sued, obviously. Two, it helps loosen the rules up so gamers can enjoy the humor without commenting on how X spell/ability doesn't work like that in the real game.


	2. Ragtag Misfits

Kimihito Kurusu spent the rest of his free time during the week coming up with a suitable adventure for the girls. His old group had used to take turns at being a Catacomb Master, or CM, so everyone could enjoy a chance both behind and in front of the screen. But it had been a while and he wanted this to be special, so he pulled out all the stops and did a lot of research into coming up with an adventure. He also made sure to visit the Game Stop store in town and pick up some necessary gaming supplies. His own gear was good but he needed to augment it a bit to have enough for all of them.

He was halfway through designing a suitable 'catacomb' when realizing he might have a problem. Using standard C&C monsters would be akin to making them fight each other, or their own people. The game had been designed before the new laws came out after all. Back then nobody knew about goblins or orcs and thought of them just as... well... monsters.

That simply wouldn't do.

He was fairly sure the Interspecies Cultural Exchange Act Committee would have issues with it as well, and the last thing he wanted was Miss Smith angry with him. He wanted to stay on her good side. Assuming she had one.

So in the end, the adventure he designed revolved around an empire of 'evil humans' and their 'Wicked Queen' whom he could use for a boss fight later. It completely escaped his notice (or he choose to utterly ignore the fact) that his villain was modelled more or less on Miss Smith appearance wise. But that would work out best for all involved if he hoped to spare their feelings. For a bunch of inhumanly strong, powerful monsters of myth and lore... they could be remarkably sensitive about the oddest things sometimes.

But in the end he had his adventure. Something both suitably epic and reasonably simple. He didn't want to overwhelm them with too much all at once, after all. Just something to occupy their weekend. A taste of the fun he'd had as a kid.

* * *

Days ticked by until finally it was Saturday Afternoon, and Kimihito stepped across the threshold of his home with heavy plastic bags under his arms.

"I'm home!" he announced.

"Welcome home, Darling/Hubby/My Lord/Master/Honey!" a chorus of voices greeted him.

All of the girls had their character sheets ready and were gathered around the dining room table in their chosen seats. The groceries he'd just procured were mostly drinks he added to the fridge for their play, as well as some snack type foods.

"Did the Chinese arrive while I was out?" he asked, sliding some sodas into the fridge, as well as some canned lemonade and tea.

"Mhm! All set, Darling," Miia proclaimed proudly, having been the one to pay for it. Well, technically Kimihito had paid, it was his money, but she'd been the one to wait by the door until it was delivered. She considered that an accomplishment.

They had originally wanted to order out for pizza, but after that incident with the local place and the poor delivery guy, they'd kinda gotten the whole group banned. Chinese would have to do for a suitable substitute. Food had already been distributed around the table, along with drinks, and everyone was settled in comfortably. They were ready for the long haul, which was for the best because any decent adventure took time to pull off. Another reason of his to have things done Saturday.

"Anyone have any last minute questions?" he asked as he sat down in his seat behind the CM screen, at the very head of the table. "Miia? Papi? Cerea? Suu? Mero? Rachnera?"

To a one, every monster girl shook their heads. Almost in sync.

"Well then, let's get things started..." he said, clearing his throat and making a wave of his arm, his fingers wiggling as he let the magic start to take hold. "You all meet in an inn..."

And like that, they were off on an adventure.

* * *

"... the inn is your standard fare, small cozy rooms and a bigger common area wherein drinks are served by the wait staff," Kimihito explained, weaving them an in-story description of their surroundings. "The old barkeeper is well known to all of you, indeed he's a seasoned old adventurer himself, a great bear of a man with many grizzly scars," he adds, tracing a finger along his face for emphasis.

He could tell he was drawing them in, to a one, all six girls were quiet and carefully listening to his every word.

"Now, as it turns out, tonight is packed, so the six of you have only one table open you can sit at... the one with each other. So... go ahead. Make your introductions."

Miia took this as an invitation to go first. "Uhm, my Fighter picks up the first chair and sits down in it, and cheerfully waves over the others to join her when she sees they have no seats of their own."

"My Paladin gladly accepts the courteous invitation," Cerea said, picking up where Miia left off. "But she is forced to keep her back to the wall so she may better see trouble coming her way, and she does not take her right hand off of her sword hilt."

"Fine by me," replied the groups Fighter. "I'll get a seat with a better view."

"Papi and Suu arrive together," the harpy girl announced. "Old friends from long ago."

Their Catacomb Master smiled at that, and nodded in approval. "So two strange girls, one harpy one human, pop by your table as well."

"Well we already have a lamia and a centaur with us," Miia mused. "What the heck, not like anyone else will join us."

"I shall," Mero interjected.

"I as well," said Rachnera.

Mero took this as a chance to show off her roleplaying skills, sitting up in her wheelchair and resting her hands on her bosom as she prepared to introduce herself. "Hark and greetings, fair adventurers," she intoned breathily. "I am a wandering minstrel from the far reaches of the Red Reef region, far removed from..."

The others just looked at her blankly. "You're what?" asked Miia.

Mero's ears drooped. "I'm a Sea Elf Bard," she said dejectedly. "With a trident."

"Mmm, good reach," Rachnera mused. "My drow Cleric will be certain to keep you close... matter of a fact, they'll sit together. And I want to know if there's any cute boys in the tavern."

"Cute boys?" asked Kimihito, positive he'd heard her wrong. Or perhaps hoping to.

"Yeah, studs. We can't be the only adventurers here. Ooh, maybe some big strapping barbarian boys? My drow likes the human boys, oh yes... and I have charisma to spare..."

"Uhm, perhaps later...?"

She huffed, crossing her arms. "Oh fine... spoilsport."

"Do they have a menu?" Papi asked.

"Yeah, our characters are thirsty," agreed Suu.

Momentarily caught off guard by the odd request, Kimihito decided to roll with this one. It sounded much simpler. And a perfect lead-in. "Well actually as it happens, before you can ask about a menu a barmaid in a low cut top makes her way around to your table and sets a number of frothy mugs of ale on it. One for each of you."

"Drinks? We didn't order anything yet... did we?" asked Miia, confused. Her snake-like tail had even curved upward into a question mark shape, matching her comical expression.

He decided to explain, gesturing to a new piece he'd just added to the mix. "One of the patrons just came over to your table to join you," he said. "And he says ' _A round on me, friends_ ' in a gravely tone of voice. ' _I could not help but overhear you were adventurers_.'"

"What's he look like?" asked Papi.

"Does he look dangerous?" added Cerea, eyes narrowed suspiciously.

He dispelled their fears. "He's an older gentleman in rich clothes, he looks like a nobleman's servant or a courtier. And his voice is gravely, but his expression is kind, lined with wrinkles. Like a... like a grandfatherly type," he decided.

That allayed their fears. At least, for most of them. Rachnera remained suspicious. "What does he need adventurers for?"

"Are you asking him that?"

She nodded.

" _'The King of the Enchanted Kingdom is in desperate need of adventurers,_ ' he explains. ' _Seasoned veterans of conflict and magical expertise. If you're willing to come with me, he could grant you an audience and tell you more about... the particulars. But I can promise you this much... he is a very wealthy man, and a generous one as well_.'"

"A combination you'll only encounter in a fantasy world," Rachnera scoffed. She may have been taking the game a bit too seriously or a bit too flippantly, but either way she didn't seem to be enjoying herself a great deal as she took a sip of her diet soda.

Mero nudged her side. "Must you be so pessimistic? I say we accept this generous offer," she added breathily. "A chance for fame and fortune, a chance to experience daring heroics... a chance...!"

"Let's just hear this king out," Miia said. "We can always turn him down... right?"

"Doubt it," Papi said. Suu nodded beside her.

"Well, even so... let's do this. We all agreed?" asked Miia.

"I guess we are," Cerea nodded. "Let's meet with the King."

* * *

There was a brief pause in the action as Kimihito allowed the girls to refill their drinks and take a moment to use the facilities. When they returned, he carried on the adventure.

"Following the aged Seneschal," he narrated. "For that is what he is... you leave the tavern and travel the short distance down the road and into the valley where the King's Castle is found. From here, the royal family rule benevolently over the Enchanted Kingdom, meeting out wisdom and justice, tempered by mercy."

"They sound so wonderful," Mero said, hands clasped before her.

Rachnera rolled her eyes. _All_ of them. "Definitely fantasy."

Ignoring her, the other girls leaned in more closely to listen as he continued to tell them of events unfolding before them.

"The King and Queen greet you in their grand hall," he narrated. "An open, cathedral-esque sort of place with holy knights standing in two rows alongside you, and a short dais on which the thrones of the monarchy rest. The King is a sturdy sort of figure, broad shouldered and moderately tall, with a great flowing beard..." here he gestured in front of his face for emphasis, "And very warm brown eyes. His wife the Queen is a stunning woman, much smaller and more petite but resplendent in her shimmering white gown. The two of them rise as you enter, welcoming the six of you with open arms, the King saying ' _Thank you for coming to hear our request, brave Adventurers_.'"

Cerea bowed her head to Kimihito in lieu of her Paladin doing the same to the rulers of the Enchanted Kingdom. "It was the very least we could do for you, your majesties. Now, please, tell us. What troubles have befallen you that you seek our aid?"

Their CM also bowed his head, presumably in place of the King or Queen doing so. "' _Thank you for coming_ ,' the King says. ' _As you know, our land has long enjoyed its peace and plenty. Almost a decade has gone past and we have enjoyed fruitful times. But not all has been well in the world. To the west lies a land forsaken by the Gods, and ruled over by a Wicked Queen who desires nothing less than our destruction_.'"

"That's horrible," Miia interjected.

Kimihito nodded. " _'Indeedly so. But fortunately our army has worked tirelessly to protect our borders. And for all her power, the Wicked Queen has... usually... been unable to destroy us. But... but all that changed of late_ ,'" he said, his voice quavering a little with false emotion, as if filled with a great sadness.

"What has happened?" asked Cerea.

"' _Our son, the Prince, was visiting a neighboring kingdom on a diplomatic mission. But upon his return, his carriage was ambushed by the Dark Knights who serve the Wicked Queen. Only one was left alive, and only then to relay a message to us. She's taken the Prince hostage. She's threatened to curse him if we don't surrender within a week. She's going to turn him into a hideous slug_.'"

Papi and Suu brought their hands to their mouths in horror at the idea, and Mero almost did the same, feeling her eyes moisten at the idea of such a terrible fate befalling anyone. And a Prince, no less. None of the others were much enthused to the idea either.

"Why don't he simply send his army in to get the Prince?" asked Rachnera.

Miia swatted her lightly with the tip of her tail. "D'uh! 'cause then we wouldn't have an adventure!"

Kimihito smiled, since she was technically correct, but provided an in-game explanation instead. "' _Because our nations military might is paltry compared to the Evil Empire_ ,' says the King. ' _This mission calls for stealth and subtlety_.'"

Cerea glanced at the others, raising an eyebrow. "Not the words I'd use to describe us," she admitted.

" _In any case_ ," he went on. " _The front gate to the Wicked Queens palace is suicide. And sending the army would enable her ample time to transform the Prince. Or worse. But there is another way. There is a back entrance two days from here that leads to an underground series of catacombs. The tunnels lead into the dungeons beneath the Wicked Queens castle. And to my son, the Prince. A small group of seasoned heroes should have no trouble entering that way and rescuing him_."

"Makes sense," Miia agreed.

" _And of course, you will all be richly rewarded for your bravery_ ," the CM went on. " _When and if you return... alive_."

"Well, that's foreboding," Mero said. Half a second passed before she cheerfully added, "I'm in!"

"Me too," Miia agreed.

"I as well," Cerea said. "This Prince sounds most noble and kind, and it is my Paladin's duty to rescue him from the forces of Evil."

"We're in too!" Papi and Suu cheered, arms looped around each other's shoulders. "Off on an adventure!"

Rachnera gave a subtle nod, seemingly uninterested in the whole thing. But her lack of protest spoke volumes.

Kimihito smiled at their enthusiasm, leaning back a moment and letting them bask in it. They'd taken their first steps into a much larger world of fantasy. That he had a part in that was equally heartwarming. "Before you go," he interrupted gently. "The King says ' _I have something for you that may aid you in your quest_ ' and holds out his hand, presenting it to you."

All six girls leaned in closer.

"He holds in the palm of his hand a ring of platinum, and explains ' _It was meant to protect my son, the Prince... it bears a magical aura that will ensure the safety of whomever wears it. But in his absence, it may yet prove more suitable in your care. Until you can return it to him, that is_.'"

He'd scarcely finished when a deafening cacophony of "MINE!" tore through the air, and each of his monstrous roommates was suddenly at one another's throats, yelling and screaming to be heard.

Frightened, Kimihito ducked down, using the Catacomb Master screen and the table as a shield. _What on earth had set them off?_ he wondered. _Sure they'd been having a bit of different opinions but that was normal for an adventuring party. They had their disagreements but didn't come to blows. Then all that had changed when... oh_ , he realized. _A ring. For a Prince. That might've been a bit much for them_.

"I'll safeguard the ring for our Prince!" Cerea said.

"No, I'll do it!" protested Mero.

Suu and Papi both reached across the table towards Kimihito. "We'll take it! We'll take it!"

"I'll keep it extra safe," Suu promised.

"Papi will protect the ring!"

Rachnera scoffed at that idea. "You're a harpy, you don't even have fingers! I will take the ring!"

"Not on your life, 'Drow'" Mero said, making air quotations with her fingers. "A vile creature such as you cannot be trusted with such a-grack!"

"VILE?!"

 _Yikes. Who knew one ring would've caused such disharmony. Maybe should've made it a bracelet_ , he thought. _Bracelets are the non-relationship jewelry of choice_.

Aloud, he said, "Girls, girls! Let's settle this in C&C fashion," he proclaimed, holding up a six sided die. "Everybody rolls, highest number wins. No hard feelings."

They wasted no time in producing their die and rolling, letting the six-sided cubes roll, skip and scatter across the tabletop. Suu got a one, and seemed to retreat into her raincoat. Cerea didn't do much better, though she bore her defeat with greater dignity. A two wasn't much competition, after all. Papi and Rachnera each managed a three, and looked ready to pounce on one another, before Suu rolled a five. Mero's paltry four was thus doomed before it even finished rolling, leaving the poor mermaid to silently cry as the proceedings went on.

And Miia... had rolled a natural six.

"YES!" she cheered, pumping her fist in the air. "That ring is mine!"

Kimihito nodded. "It's a Ring of +2 AC," he explained. "Adjust your Armor Class accordingly."

"Sweet... I'll take good care of it for the precious Prince," she said, miming slipping the ring on. Specifically, onto her _ring_ finger. The other girls glared at her from their seats. Kimihito shrunk down in his own, grateful for the Catacombs Master screen to partially hide him. If looks could kill, half the house would be on fire right about now.

As it is, the game was afoot, and time to get going. They had a long way to go towards rescuing the Prince and vanquishing the Wicked Queen.

* * *

 **Authors Notes:  
** Well, this ain't just any game no more.

Naturally, the ring scene was inspired by the Lord of the Rings. Who indeed knew that One little ring could cause so much trouble?


	3. Road to Adventure

The adventurers spend the night at the Enchanted Castle, enjoying the finest accomodations the King and Queen could possibly have provided. Fine silken sheet beds, a change of clothes suited to their respective races figures, and of course a great big feast in the morning. As the sun rose on the horizon, however, they were off on the road towards the castle of the Wicked Queen.

They knew all this, because the Catacombs Master was narrating it for them, extrapolating the flavor text to paint a picture in their heads of a pleasant evening. Their imaginations filled in the rest.

"No one plans on taking any detours now, right? Last minute trip to the blacksmith or the library or anything?"

The six girls shook their heads, not wanting to interrupt his narrative. They were transfixed by the story. A story starring them in the lead roles.

"Well alright. Then you're off on the main road. It winds between kingdoms and nations and stretches far and wide across the fantasy land. And luckily it's a pretty straight forward trip over the mountains and towards the castle of the Wicked Queen."

"And it'll only take us two days to get there?"

"That's absolutely correct," he confirmed, double-checking behind his screen. "Two days and one night."

"Ooh, night, we'll have to camp out then," said Miia. "When do we start looking for a good place to set up camp?"

"When the sun starts to set," Cerea replied, having often camped out as a child. Her race was naturally inclined towards outdoor activity as a general rule, making them experts at such things. "We'll have to set guards too," she realized. "In case we have a... a..."

Kimihito waited for her to remember the terminology, not wanting to interrupt her thought process or make her feel foolish.

"Strange Encounter?" she asked. "Close encounter?"

He gently shook his head. " _Random_ encounter."

"Right, right, one of those."

Papi threw up a hand to draw attention to herself. "Papi has a spell to protect the camp! It's called a Watchdog!"

"You're a little early for that," their Catacombs Master declared. "Especially since... a few hours into your travel..." he rolled his die behind the screen and consulted the results. "You see a squadron of soldiers coming down the road!"

"Random Encounter!" declared Cerea, reaching for her dice with as much fervor as she would use to reach for her sword. "Quick, we must prepare for battle."

Rachnera grabbed her shoulder before she could get too involved. "Hold on there. We don't necessarily have to fight them."

"... of course we do, that's the point of a Random Encounter... isn't it?" asked Miia, who was also going for her dice.

"Re-read the rules, scales for brains," Rachnera replied haughtily. "They might be good soldiers. Or, even if they're not, we don't have to fight every living thing we see. We can persuade them to let us pass. Maybe honey call tell us a bit more about them?"

"Well, once they get within sight you can make out about seven of them in total. You can tell they're soldiers because they're dressed identically in dark scalemail armor and wearing black tabards over it. All bearing the symbol of the Wicked Queen. They wear identical face-concealing helmets, making them look equally the same."

"Ah, I recognize this creature... these are _Mooks_ ," Cerea identified, still shaking her die, anxious to begin the battle. "Perfect for our first fight."

"Think we can take them?" Miia said. "The Dark Knights outnumber us."

"Only by one. They're probably not as tough as we are," Cerea replied.

"But we can't fight everything between here and the castle," Mero protested. "What if we run into more before we can rest?"

"Do we have time to avoid them?" asked Miia.

Their Catacombs Master paused and looked behind the screen at his notes. "Well... they are far enough away you might get lucky, unless one of them spots you... let's see..." he paused and rolled some die, double-checking them against his information. After tallying up their results, he did some quick checking against his own numbers. "They haven't spotted you just yet," he replied. "Their helmets don't give them very good vision. If you can get to cover they may not even notice you."

"Let's get to cover then," Miia said. "My Fighter dives into the bushes."

"Reluctant though my Paladin is to flee... better to avoid senseless bloodshed. She also moves to hide behind some trees," Cerea said.

"Hiding time!" Papi and Suu added in unison.

"Into the underbrush," agreed Mero.

Their CM nodded, going down the line... then paused when he reached Rachnera, who was sitting there with a grin on her face. "Uh, Rachnera? What's your Cleric doing?"

"Standing in the middle of the road," she replied casually. "Hood over her head to keep the sunlight off but that's about it. She doesn't want to hide. She _wants_ the soldiers to see her."

"WHAT?"

"Rachnera are you insane you're going to get killed!" Cerea tried to reason with her. "I'm coming out to help you."

The spider-lady cracked her knuckles. "Just stand back and watch," she instructed. "I can handle this alone."

"Cerea? Is your Paladin moving back into the road?"

"... no, not yet," the centaur decided, wondering what on earth Rachnera could be up to. If they attacked, none of her party would be able to help her in time. But the pale-haired spider blinked her many eyes and simply waited until the soldiers were closer, then brazenly called out to them.

" _Greetings, friends_ ," she drawled, a faint lilt in her voice indicating she was speaking 'in character' with them. " _What brings you so far out this way_?"

"The soldiers drew to a halt in front of you, forming a line of two by three," Kimihito narrated. "The foremost soldier, perhaps an officer, steps forward to regard you, hand on the hilt of his sword. ' _We are loyal servants of the Wicked Queen_ ' he says. ' _And we patrol these lands she has claimed for herself_.'"

" _Oh, she's claimed them, has she_?" Rachnera cooed, pouring on false charm like honey. " _Well I am a Drow Ambassador from the Underdark, here on behalf of my Matron Mother to open negotiations with the Wicked Queen_. And she draws back her hood to emphasize this," she added, miming the gesture.

"The soldiers take a good look at her face and conclude she is a drow, at least," he admitted. "' _What you say may be true, but what proof have we of it? We were ordered to find those who threaten her rule and make an end to such_ ,' he says."

" _Well as a matter of a fact... I_ did _see some strange, untrustworthy sorts just recently_ ," Rachnera said, glancing over at her fellow players.

Miia's jaw dropped. "YOU'RE SELLING US OUT?!"

Half of her red eyes winked, then she returned her attention to their CM. " _Yes I think I saw them somewhere to the south, near your borders? A group of no more than a dozen, all very strange and unsavory sorts_."

Figuring out her strategy, their dark-haired Catacombs Master checked behind his screen, rolling some die. A check against bluffs perhaps, or a skillset to see if they had more brains than the average mook. Whatever it was, Kimihito smiled when his head came back up, and he decided to play along.

" _We believe you. Can you tell us more about them_?"

" _Well, let's see, I can tell you two are half ogre brothers, and another is a dwarf with a mighty beard_ ," she went on, clearly enjoying spinning a web of lies as the other players at the table grinned at some of her more outlandish ones. She was giving the Dark Knights the exact opposite of them to search for, and in the wrong place. It was too perfect.

" _Excellent. We'll be going now then_."

" _Oh, before you go just one thing? You see the Wicked Queen is expecting me... is there a shorter path to her castle_?"

He shook his head. " _Only this road_."

" _Oh well, worth a shot... have fun now, honey_ ," her drow concluded, giving a wave of her hand.

"The soldiers form up and march southwards in search of the group that you... oh so helpfully," he added with a smirk. "Told them about. You likely won't be seeing them again."

Rachnera had just defeated an entire platoon of Dark Knights without a single hitpoint being lost.

"That was some very quick thinking and excellent roleplaying," Kimihito congratulated her, making the eight-eyed lady blush faintly. "Award yourself five hundred experience."

Not nearly as much as she and the others could've gotten from just killing the Dark Knights, but it was a fair bit all the same. And now, Rachnera didn't even have to share it with the others. She gleefully jotted down the amount as the others re-emerged onto the road. Now with a little less opposition in their way, the band of adventurers continued on their trek towards the Wicked Queen's castle.

One encounter was down, but there were many more possibilities between them and their objective. This was not over by a long shot.

* * *

Several minutes in the real world and several hours in the game, the party reached a suitable forest grove just off the main path, where they could set up for the night and rest for the next leg of their journey.

"This seems like a good place to sleep," Miia said. "We'll pitch our tents and light a fire for the night."

"Do we want to risk a fire?" Cerea asked. "It may be seen."

"What, you think the Wicked Queen has more patrols out there?"

"Its likely," Rachnera agreed. "Probably safer we don't have a fire."

"We need a fire long enough to cook," interjected the mermaid at her side. "My Bard begins preparations for the evening meal, taking over the chore of cooking. I have a bonus to my chef proficiency, so I should be able to whip up something very excellent in short order."

"What do you need to cook for?" asked Miia. "Iron rations are made to eat, and they don't require cooking."

"And stay good for days," Cerea added.

Across them from the table, Rachnera smirked. "All that's true, but they taste worse than Miia's cooking on a really good day."

"Hey!"

"So if you'll excuse me I'll help our Bard get the evening meal ready," she added. "Suu? Papi? Can you get the tents ready?"

"Can do!" the younger girls replied, saluting. Their characters went to work pitching the tents and setting up the rest of the campsite, using the nearby trees to anchor themselves down and provide a little cover from the wilderness and, hopefully, roving beasts. There was another chance of a Random Encounter before morning, after all, and they didn't want to trust to luck saving them a second time.

"Okay, you all settle down for the night. Can everyone roll a die twenty?" he requested.

They did so, and he checked the results.

"Well, you notice the random encounter before it gets to close to you, but it does get close and most of you are still asleep because you didn't set a watch

"What?!" demanded Miia. "What about the mage's Watchdog spell?!"

"Oops. Papi forgot to cast it," their blue-haired wizardess said with sheepishh grin.

"Okay, well, fortunately, Suu was able to waken in time," Kimihito said, indicating her die roll. "... and she sees, at the far end of the grove... over a dozen Dark Knights, armed to the teeth," he finished ominously.

"Oh no!"

"Opposition!" declared Cerea. "My Paladin draws her sword and prepares to fight!"

"Well there's no way we can slip away from this," agreed Rachnera. "Cleric picks up her mace and prepares to fight."

"I wake up anyone who was still sleeping," Suu added quickly.

"Casting fireball!" interjected Papi excitedly. "Fireball! Fireball!"

"Blood, Death and Vengeance!" cheered Mero. She'd heard the phrase somewhere before as a battle cry and found it had a certain charm to it.

"I go first!" Miia declared.

"No, me first!"

"I should go first!"

"Hey, what about me?!"

"Any chance we can just avoid them? Or I dunno, run?"

"They do kinda outnumber us."

"Too late for that."

Two hands swiftly formed a 'T' indicating it was high time for a time out.

"Girls, girls, whoa!" Kimihito had to shout to be heard.

That brought them up short. Once everyone had settled, he released a breath and explained.

"First things first. You have to roll initiative to see whose action goes first. Everyone roll the appropriate die while I set up the board," he said, doing just that. Their figurines were arrayed on one side of the room according to their marching order, while he added the Dark Knights on the other side.

"What're these green tokens?" Cerea asked.

"Trees," Kimihito said, laying them out randomly on the board. They were a minor obstacle to consider in the fight but nothing insurmountable. "Alright, who has initiative?"

"I think I do," Cerea said. "And my Paladin has as clear line of attack for this Dark Knight here. So I will charge and attack with my sword. And if his heart is wicked I do extra damage because of my classes abilities."

"Smite evil, huh?"

"That's the one. Smite evil!" she declared in a booming voice, nearly making the table shake.

A roll of the dice rewarded positive results, a hit and quite a bit of damage, nearly crippling one of their enemies in a single powerful blow. Determined not to be outclassed by their Paladin, the others quickly jockeyed for position and made their own attacks, cutting a swath of destruction through the more numerous Dark Knights.

"Papi casts a spell!" the harpy girl cheered.

"Which spell is that, Papi?"

"Fireball! Fireball!" she shouted joyfull, cupping her feathered hands and making the motions as if she was doing it herself.

"And just uh... where are you aiming it?" he inquired, glancing at the board.

"Papi will fire right here!"

Seeing her target, four girls swiftly cried out "NO!" with such force it nearly knocked the blue-haired harpy out of her chair.

Kimihito smiled gently. "Papi, are you sure you'd like to fireball _right there_? The blast radius from the spell would include half your teammates if you did. They'd be fried."

"Oh, uhm, okay... here?" she said, trying a different point on the map. It was a bit further away but it only caught bad guys in its area of effect instead of her teammates.

"That works. Roll for damage."

Die were rolled by the clumsy hands of the blue-haired harpy, who nearly knocked over her drink before Suu caught it and rightened the container. Once the die had stopped rolling, Kimihito quickly did the math to their outcome, knowing it would take her a little longer to add them all up.

"Well that much damage outright kills the one caught in the center," he remarked, tossing aside the piece representing him. "And does damage the other two. Unfortunately, your fireball also quickly sets several nearby trees on fire..." he set down a few red tokens to indicate the burning trees, replacing the green ones from earlier. "Anyone whose too close to one will suffer burning damage next turn."

"Papi, you need to be more careful with that spell," Mero admonished her lightly.

"Papi is sorry," replied the harpy Wizardess.

Suu picked up a twenty sided die... but hesitated.

"You're certain we're allowed to fight humans?" she inquired.

"It's just a game," he assured her. "Go nuts."

The little slime girl smiled as she rolled the gently tossed the die, which landed on a very high number indeed. Unfortunately her class wasn't suited for combat, and her staff wasn't the strongest of weapons. Even so, some damage was better than none, and the adventurers continued to avoid any major trouble as the Dark Knights began their counterattack, landing a few modest blows and missing the rest. Given their numbers, it was a comfort more than anything else.

Even so, one landed a lucky hit that left Miia bleeding pretty badly. Rachnera's turn came up and she decided to come to her aid.

"I'll cast a healing spell to restore her hitpoints," the spider-lady said. "One Cure Light, coming up."

But then she saw her Catacombs Master shaking her head.

"What, did I do something wrong, Honey?"

"It's a touch spell, Rachneesan," he replied. "Your character has to be right up alongside Miia to cast it effectively on her."

"Then this turn I'll move, next turn I'll cast."

"Fair enough."

Kimihito sighed, reaching up to rub at his temples, but reminded himself the girls were still just learning the game. He was positive he hadn't been half as good a player when he'd started so many years ago. Surely there was just some starter mistakes, they'd smooth these out in no time and do better as time went on. Right?

* * *

Well, it could have gone worse at any rate.

They had a few more hiccups after that, but thankfully nothing that cost them life or limb. Or forced any of them to roll up a new character. That would have been quite the record setting after only one random encounter. But they managed to survive. After that it was just a matter of wearing down the opposition one at a time until the last of them bit the dust. Not a problem, since the Wicked Queen's soldiers evidently weren't very well trained. Or at least her patrols weren't. The last one bit the dust with a most undignified wail under the harsh impalement by Mero's trident.

The fight was over, and victory was theirs.

* * *

 **Authors Notes:  
** Nothing this time.


	4. Dividing the Spoils

With the battle over, the girls quickly came together for some healing patchwork on their wounds, though they were few in number. Most Rachnera didn't even bother with a healing spell for. A good night's rest would take care of it. Besides, Papi and Suu were anxious for the next part of the encounter: Looting the bodies.

"Time for loot! Time for loot!" they cheered in unison.

The Catacombs Master nodded, already having a basic idea of what to do, but as always, let his dice do the deciding for him. He rolled his die for the random encounter, and gave a "Hmmm" in response. Taking a moment to consult his manuals, he decided on an appropriate 'loot' for his adventurers to find after strip-searching the bodies of the Dark Knights.

"You find thirty gold and forty-seven silver on their bodies, in total, and also their armor and weapons. Most are standard bastard swords and hunting knives, and each is dressed in a leather jerkin underneath their tunics. But amongst these you discover one of their swords, which is a long sword, bears a magical dweom-... dwee-... it's glowing," he finished, unable to quite pronounce the word. _Honestly, why did I even try that_?

"Oooh, must be magical."

The six girls exchanged a knowing look before simultaneously standing up and raising their hands.

"MINE!"

Kimihito chuckled a little at their behavior, well remembering just how he'd been the same way when he'd used to play. Everybody wanted first loot option, everybody wanted the cool magic items. If not for themselves, then to sell for more money. Fortunately, after the ring fiasco, he was ready for them this time. "You girls know the rule," he said, indicating the multicolored die in front of them.

Evidently they did, as they quickly rolled their six-siders.

Four, five, four, three, two, and finally a six. Awarding the sword to...

"MIIA?!"

"Woohoo!" cheered the lamia girl, pumping up her fists. "Magic sword is mine!"

"No fair, you already got the magic ring!" Mero protested.

"That's the Prince's, I'm just keeping it safe for him," she hissed back. Her tail lashed behind her.

"Even so, its not fair you get the sword too. We all want it!" Rachnera growled at her.

"Can you even use that sword?" asked Miia, reptilian eyes narrowing to angry slits.

"Uh... well... I guess not..." Rachnera said, remembering her Cleric class was limited very specifically to blunt weapons. Stupid rules. Clerics should totally get swords. She huffed angrily, folding her arms across her chest and narrowing all six of her eyes.

"The rules of the game are quite clear," Cerea said, trying to accept defeat with all the grace she could muster. "Die determine the outcome. Miia won the sword fair and square. However, I would suggest an addendum to those rules. Miia, will you withdraw yourself from the next roll for magical items? So we have a chance to gain some for ourselves?"

The diplomatic approach worked, as Miia fumed a little at being left out, but didn't really want to be seen as a greedy bitch. Especially in front of her Darling. "Fine," she pouted. "I already got the cool sword, I don't need anything else. Ooh, what does it do, Darling?"

He smiled enigmatically. "I can't tell you," he said. "You need to figure it out for yourself."

"What? You told me what the ring does," Miia protested.

"The King and Queen told you that," he clarified. "I'm sorry, I should have made that more clear from the beginning. But it's not like its written on the sword. And you can't exactly ask the Dark Knight who was carrying it, now can you?"

"They're dead," Suu remarked, commenting on the obvious.

"Wait, our mage should have a spell to identify magical items," Mero said, glancing over at the harpy, who nodded.

"Papi casts identify spell," Papi said, waving her feathered hands over Miia. "Tells us what the sword does."

"Quite correct," he agreed. "It's a relatively simple +1 sword. You add one to all of your attack and damage rolls. Nothing too special."

"Still, its mine," Miia said. "My fighter takes it and replaces the sword at her hip with it, putting her non-magical blade in her backpack with the rest to sell later."

"Fair enough."

"I'll take their armor," Cerea added. "We can sell it in town and divvy up the gold later. I'll carry it because I'm strongest."

"Fine by me," Rachnera agreed. Anything that freed her up to carry more valuable items was welcome. _Let the centaur play pack mule_ , she thought, but did not say so aloud.

"Do they have any food on them?" Mero inquired politely.

"Food?"

"Yes, like, besides rations? Salt or spice? I suppose it's too much to hope they have fruits or vegetables with them as well?"

He rolled his die, but it seemed he was mostly covering his actions before shaking his head. "Ah, no such luck. Afraid they only had enough supplies for a five day patrol. Just some more iron rations."

"Phoo," she muttered, folding her arms.

"Well then, I guess that covers looting the bodies, so uh..."

Kimihito paused, blinking in surprise as an otherworldly figure descended from on high down to their tabletop gathering. A pale head with long white hair was set on the table beside Miia's meal, while the body worked to collect the pieces of the fallen Dark Knights. She deftly snatched up the figurines and took them for herself.

"Lala?"

"These mortal opponents have passed beyond the veil," the reaper girls head replied. "They are in my possession now. Beware all those who may choose to follow in their footsteps, I am ever watchful."

A bit overly dramatic, but Kimihito supposed this was just her way of joining in the fun. He could indulge her.

The others at the table were less convinced. They saw the way Lala was playing with her scythe as she watched the proceedings. Her words seemed less she was playing along and more they were playing for keeps. Like she'd try and reap one of them if their characters happened to die.

 _Oh well, no guts, no glory_ , Miia decided. "Let's find a new campsite nearby, and try to get back to sleep."

* * *

They camped out again another half mile down the road, away from the stench of battle, and Kimihito assured them the night went without further incident.

It was then their Catacombs Master also realized he'd neglected an important part of the Catacomb Crawling experience, and given them all the appropriate points. Or as he called them, "XP."

"Eckepee?" asked Papi.

"Experience," Miia remembered. "You remember, when we created our characters, we got so much XP to determined their levels? We now we got more. Anyone get a level out of that mess?"

"Not I," Centorea remarked sadly, unsurprised. Paladins were expensive for all their exotic abilities, mean she was less impressively along then her teammates. At least, for the moment.

"Me either," chorused the lamia and the arachnia. They were close, but not quite close enough.

"I have!" Mero announced cheerfully, arm upraised. "That last Dark Knight was just enough to propel me to the next level of ability."

"Oh great, does that mean you finally got some useful skills?" jibbed Rachnera.

The pink-haired mermaid huffed at her. "I will have you know my Bard's singing ability is unparallel. And this means I can pick up a song of my choice for my new level. I was leaning towards the Dirge of Detection," she explained, showing them the appropriate page in the Players Manual. "It helps sense good and evil intentions. But I'm sort of partial to this Melody of Malignment as well."

"What's that one do?"

The mermaid proceeded to explain, while meanwhile the little slime girl slid around the table and up to Kimihito's side, looking up at him with her character sheet clutched in her gloved hands.

"Suu has levelled too," the little slime girl said. "Help please?"

He gave her a kindly smile. "Sure thing. Girls? Can we break for ten?"

Bobbing heads around the table indicated they could, as they broke off to individual interests and tasks while Kimihito led Suu aside and helped her level up her human Druid. Cerea took the time to clear her plate and portion of the table, while Miia and Rachnera poured through the Players Manual for more information about their own character classes. Though they hadn't levelled yet, they were getting closer to that point. The next encounter might well be all they needed, and they intended to be ready for it. And Papi? Well she seemed distracted by the rolling of a twenty-sided die in her possession, seemingly amazed at how many sides and facets it held as she rolled it across the table in front of her again and again and again.

Rolling for more hitpoints was easy, as was picking a few new spells to add to Suu's repertoire. But Druids were a versatile sort of class, Kimihito remembered, and had some of the more unusual abilities. Especially at higher levels. He was very glad he hadn't given the group more starting XP, or else his campaign would've had to have been much much harder in correspondence. As it was, however...

"Can Suu shapeshift yet?" she asked.

"Is that why you picked druid?" he asked, remembering well that aspect of their characters. Really, who wouldn't enjoy becoming a bear, or an owl, or a snake? Sadly though, she wasn't quite there yet. "Sorry, that's next level. But you're getting closer."

Suu nodded, smiling, and slid off her chair to go get a glass of water before the game resumed. Kimihito placed her character sheets, now fully updated, on the table by her dice, and settled back behind his Catacombs Master screen. The girls had been through their first Random Encounters and gotten the basics of combat down, but this was chump change compared to the big rewards to come. _Time to really up the stakes_ , he decided.

An almost uncharacteristic grin stretched across his features as shadows seemed to pool around the unassuming, dark-haired man. Behind the screen, however, he was a force of danger and darkness. Kimihito no more, the Catacombs Master was preparing the brave adventurers gloom and doom.

* * *

The finer details of their encounter out of the way, the adventurers were once again on the move, setting a brisk pace through what their CM described as a once lush, beautiful terrain. Which steadily became more corrupt as time went on. Trees were dying, grounds were parched and cracked, once mighty rivers had become little more than trickles, if they flowed at all. Ominous crows circled in the skies overhead, and Kimihito gave them such vivid description that Mero felt herself shiver at the thought of it.

"As the forest comes to an end and you find yourself in the mountains, you see a road leading gradually upwards in the direction you want to go. The tell-tale sign of heavy boots are found in the ground, clearly an army or two has marched this way in the past."

"Lots of evil humans?" asked Papi forlornly.

Again, Kimihito did his best to assure her of their fictional nature. Despite being old enough to, as they say, be fruitful and multiply, her personality was very much that of a child. "Its just a game," he assured her. "But yes, the armies of the Wicked Queen have been through here. You catch no sign of them, however, as you proceed along the road."

"Even so, this is looking more and more like her territory," Cerea said. "We should be wary."

"Weapons out," Miia instructed the others. "Fighter is arming her broadsword."

"Papi is ready to fireball anyone who comes our way," the harpy beside her affirmed.

"Just be sure not to roast us as well," her lamia counterpart instructed. "Aim carefully, okay?"

"'kay."

"Ah, speaking of aim," Kimihito interrupted. "Roll for surprise?"

They all rolled, and to a one all succeeded.

"Okay you get one round free before the archers in the nearby tower start shooting you."

"Tower?!" they exclaimed in one voice.

"There's a short military garrison tower just off the side of the road," he explained, trying not to wince at their volume. "Partially hidden by the rock face. They took a moment to notice you, but now that you are within range of their weapons, they're opening fire with bows and arrows at maximum range."

"Fireball!" Papi declared. "Fwhoosh!"

"They're outside of the range of a fireball," he explained. "Now, you CAN run over to the fortress and try to engage them in combat, but given the distance and composition of the walls of the tower you may have quite the uphill battle. You'll get hit quite a lot the closer you get as well. The alternate option is to run until you're outside their bow range."

"We'll run!" Miia said. "Fighter makes a beeline across the kill zone!"

Cerea nodded. "Likewise, my Paladin goes into full gallop."

"What they said!" Suu quickly chimed in.

He quickly set up the checkered board, lining up their figurines. "Here's where you start," he explained, drawing a line at the far end of the board with a felt-tipped pen. Erasable, of course. "Get past this line, and you're out of the archer's range. Go. No need to roll initiative, we'll just go around the table."

Miia and Centorea, who were on his immediate left, slid their figures forward the appropriate number of spaces. As a centaur, the Paladin was a quick gallop, and easily outpaced her comrades. The Lamia with her, however, wasn't much slower, and kept pace. Next came...

"Papi casts fly spell!" said the diminutive harpy, waving her feathered hands. "Want to fly to safety!"

Rachnera, Miia, and curiously, Suu, all facepalmed. Suu was the one who had to break the truth to the poor deluded Wizard. "Papi can already fly," she said, pointing out the race on her character sheet. The one that matches her real world counterpart. Harpy. Who had wings. Ergo...

"Papi flies to safety!" she declared, changing her actions immediately.

He decided to let her slip up slide, having no valid argument that a Wizard, even a scatterbrained one like Papi, could forget that in a real fight. However... "It's the same distance up as it is forward to escape the line of sight from the archers," he said. "So just move your piece forward at the rate you fly until you're out of range."

She did so, and was quickly followed by Suu, who as only a Human was much slower than the others. Mero and Rachnera were likewise hampered by a simple pair of legs and average height. Kimihito rolled for another round. Cerea got struck but thankfully took a minimum of damage. Worse was the arrow that hit Mero's Bard, dealing a critical.

"Oh no!" Mero cried, knocking over her figurine. "I fear my Bard has been struck in the leg! I cannot escape! Go on without me, noble companions! Oh woe is me, to die so far from the watery home I love so much..."

Cerea rolled her eyes, but did not hesitate. "My Paladin goes back for her."

"I'll help her up," Rachnera added, using her next move to slide up to the mermaid's figurine and helping her Sea Elf back to her two legs. By the time the Paladin got back to them, they'd taken a few near misses, but thankfully avoided being hit by anymore arrows. The Drow loaded her aquatic elven cousin onto the Centaur's back and the three of them beat a hasty retreat from the battlefield.

* * *

"Aaand... you're finally out of range," Kimihito said. The girls breathed a sigh of relief. "Nor do the Dark Knights in the garrison pursue you. You're safe to continue your journey."

"Joy," muttered Rachnera. "Yank out the arrow and Cure Light Wounds for Miss Melodramatic over here," she jerked a claw at her pink-haired housemate.

"My Bard slips off of the Paladin's back and gives her thanks to both of her brave rescuers," Mero said, seemingly put out she hadn't been able to die dramatically, but truly grateful all the same for their rescue. " _After_ she lets out a bloodcurdling scream on having an arrow pulled out of her, of course," she added with a glare at Rachnera.

"Let's try to stay alert from now on," Miia suggested. "Everybody keep watch until we get to where we're going."

"Actually you're just about there," their Catacombs Master interjected calmly.

"We are?"

He nodded. "Just a short distance away the road winds up the side of a hill, giving a clear view of the surrounding region which is devoid of life. Unlike before, where you saw trees dying and dead, here there is nothing in virtually every direction. It is near sunset when you arrive, the skies overhead are growing darker and more red as the sun begins to set. Shadows grow long and ominous, as if they are reaching for you. And there, on the red horizon, is an ominous slab of black with great huge spires reaching up towards the sky. Like the claws of a demon."

Kimihito the Catacombs Master paused dramatically before continuing. "The Castle... of the Wicked Queen."

* * *

 **Authors Notes** **:  
** Some have asked, so I'll answer. No, I'm not Lala's biggest fan, but I don't outright hate her either. Its just difficult to write her into the story given her modus operandi in the manga. So she'll get a cute cameo here and there, but nothing truly story impacting. Sorry for all the fans of the Dullahan.


	5. Storming the Castle

"We approach a little closer," Miia said. "Weapons out, spells ready."

"Fireball comin' online, hubby," Papi added cutely.

He smirked, but continued to narrate to give them an idea of what they were up against. "The castle is huge, easily twice the size of its counterpart back in the Enchanted Kingdom, and surrounded by towering walls and great spires. Gargoyles line the edges, perched and ready to pou..."

"Real gargoyles?" interrupted Miia.

He spared her a look and grinned. "There's one way to find out," he said. Then continued with his flavor text.

"... ready to pounce on unwary travelers. Dark Knights armed to the teeth patrols the parapets and the curtain wall, and the drawbridge is raised and closed in any case, the only visible means of entry. The moat below doesn't look very welcoming either, you're positive you caught sight of something slimy and tentacular moving amidst the dark waters."

Mero gave a lady like shudder. So much for swimming in. She was fond of European medieval fantasy, not Japanese hentai.

"Thank goodness we're not going in the front way," Miia remarked.

Their Catacombs Master nodded. "Naturally, once the castle is in sight you follow the instructions you were given on where to find the back entrance. Just where you were told it would be, a short distance away, you find the secret entrance to the Wicked Queens castle. It is found alongside the far end of the structure, far below the mountain on which it stands. There is no sign of the Black Knights or any guards as you make your way to it. Its partially covered by some foliage and ivy, but the stone door itself looks completely intact beneath all that. In fact, it appears centuries old."

"Can we open it?" asked Miia.

"You can certainly try," he replied.

"Then I'll go first," she replied. "My Fighter steps up and tries to open the door."

A faint smirk crossed his face. "It proves to be a _bit_ heavier than she can manage."

"Even with all of her strength?"

Double-checking her scorecard behind his screen, he nodded.

"Then let us assist," said Cerea. "My Paladin, Miia's Fighter, and..."

"... you can only fit one other," Kimihito warned.

"... whose our third strongest?"

"Papi is a mage, and Rachnera and Mero are both playing elves," Miia replied. "Which leave us with..."

The slime girl nodded. "Suu's Druid steps up to help. She's human. She's strong."

A possible exaggeration of her strength skill, to be sure, but it beat out most other options by a few points at least. And in this game a few points was the difference between life and death.

"Okay, on three, we all push," Miia said. "One... two... three!"

Kimihito rolled a set of die behind his screen, then nodded. "Your strength is sufficient to push open the heavy stone door, opening up an entrance which leads down into the earth. The faint scent of mildew flits out of the opening, and it is very dark within. With the sunlight fading you can't see more than ten or twenty feet inside."

"No lights. How are we supposed to see?" asked Mero.

"Does my glowing sword provide enough light?" Miia asked.

He shook his head. "Only for about ten feet, its very weak."

"I can see in the dark just fine," Rachnera replied smugly. "And so can my Cleric. Drow get infravision."

"But for the rest of us, we need some light. I'll light a torch," Miia said, very grateful she'd packed some. She dutifully crossed it off her character sheet. Torch one hand, sword in the other. She was very glad she didn't use a shield.

"Papi casts Light spell on Suu's staff," added their harpy Wizardess. The slime druidess at her side nodded gratefully.

"The entrance and tunnel are wide enough for almost any two of you, and tall enough for all of you to fit comfortably within," Kimihito explained. "But that's a tight fit and I doubt you want to risk such. Easier to go in a straight line. So, what's your marching order?"

"I'll go first," Miia said. "My Fighter is best for close range attacks. In case we run into any guards."

"Or monsters."

"Those too."

"Next," insisted Mero. "I can strike over the Lamia with my trident. It has a longer reach."

"We'll put Papi and Suu in the middle then," Cerea said. "Then Rachnera behind them and myself in the back."

"Sounds good," he said. "Entering the tunnel, a short distance down you discover a set of stairs, descending down into the catacombs. At the bottom lies an open doorway, and from there the tunnels continue on deeper into the mountain. Further down you even see an intersection, at the very edge of the torchlight."

Kimihito brushed aside a few die and nudged a character sheet out of the way, as well as some left over shrimp fried rice. Clearing the table thusly, he laid out the board of squares he'd been saving for just such an occasion. Using some cardboard squares, he outlined the . Then, he carefully picked up each girl's figure and set them in the order they'd indicated they were going in.

"... so, what do you do now?" he asked.

Mero raised an eyebrow, catching his too-mild tone. He was trying to act _too_ casual. Almost on purpose. Coupled with what she knew from movies and stories, she was immediately suspicious.

Before the others could declare their actions, she spoke up. "Wait you guys, there might be traps."

The others quickly realized the same, and conferred on what to do. Kimihito smiled, pleased they'd caught on before there was serious harm. Unfortunately, they had neglected an important detail, so he leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

"Let's have the thief check for traps," Cerea said. "That's something thieves can do, right?"

"That's right," agreed Rachnea. "Have the thief check for traps before we proceed. They can disarm them too, if I recall correctly."

A moment passed, and nobody spoke. The six girls glanced between themselves, each waiting for the other to make a move, when none of them did. Finally, it dawned on Miia. Her left eye twitched. Kimihito quickly slipped his fingers into his ears to muffle the noise.

"ARE YOU SAYING NOT ONE OF US IS PLAYING A THIEF?!"

Kimihito smirked, trying vainly not to laugh at the irony of it. But that was indeed the truth of the matter. None of them had wanted to play a thief character, or any variation thereupon. Leaving them with a very sticky situation to resolve and no easy way to do it. He'd had to tone down some of the more interesting traps he'd originally planned on when he realized this, but he couldn't very well have none.

"Okay, uhm... maybe we're wrong about the traps?" suggested Mero uncomfortably. "Why don't we just move forward?"

Her suggestion didn't go over well.

"By all means, after you," Rachnea replied. "I'll uh... guard the rear."

"Coward!" Papi accused her.

The spider woman drew herself to her full height, hand to her chest. "I'm the healer!" she declared. "If _I_ die _you all_ die, how do you feel about that?"

"Cerea can heal too! She's a paladin!" the harpy replied.

"Suu too!" piped up the little slime girl, waving a gloved hand.

"Wait a minute, isn't there a spell to detect traps?" asked Mero, picking up the Players Guide and flipping through it. "Papi, do you know it?"

"Nu-uh," the little harpy replied. She double-checked her character sheet as Suu peered over her shoulder. "I think it is a spell but my Mage never learned it. I'm sorry."

Mero, pausing in her research, patted the blue-haired harpy on the head. "It's not your fault, Papi. We just didn't expect this."

"Well, we have to come up with some plan," Cerea said, folding an arm under her ample bosom and resting her other hand on her chin, thinking deeply on the matter. The others quickly pondered the topic as well. Mero found the spell in question in the rulebook, but if no one knew it, it was useless to them. At least for now. Rachnera quickly checked to see if clerics had any similar abilities, but it did not seem likely. The others meanwhile had to think of a more practical approach to their problem.

Some way to get past the traps...

Or at least... deal with... them...

A lightbulb went off over Miia's head.

"Wait, I have an idea!" the lamia girl declared, raising up her hand to get their attention. Her tail tip was positively quivering with excitement. "It's easy. Traps do damage right? Well if we can't _detect_ them, we just need to _survive_ them. So we send our toughest party member in first, set off the traps, and then stroll down the corridor after them."

"That's actually not a bad idea," agreed Cerea, nodding in approval. "Who has the most hitpoints in our group?"

A quick check of their sheets revealed the answer: Cerea's Paladin was easily their toughest, though Miia's Fighter was a close second. The rest were about even, except for Papi's mage. No way they'd be using her for such a task, she'd be dead in seconds.

Miia stifled the urge to squeal in delight. Cerea's paladin would either remove the traps from their path or else perish before they rescued the Prince. Leaving him free to be rescued by Miia alone! If nothing else it cut down on competition. A win-win situation in her book.

The blonde centaur took her role as glorified cannon fodder with surprising dignity. "Very well, if it is the path laid out before us, then I shall see it through. My Lord? I advance my Paladin along the path."

"Sounds like you're changing the marching order. What's it going to be for the rest of you?" he asked.

"We should have Rachnera just behind Cerea," Miia suggested. "In case she needs healing." _Or the traps were very big_ , she thought to herself. Two birds with one stone.

"Nah, Suu can go," Mero said. "She's holding the light, isn't she? And druids can heal too."

Suu nodded, pressing her figure forward behind Cerea's.

"I wanna go next!" Papi said, reaching for her figure.

A deft hand snapped it up before she could. "You should be a bit further back," Rachnera intoned. "You have the longest range and the least hitpoints. The farther you are from danger, the better."

"Awww, alright. Whose next then?"

"That would be me," Mero said. "I may not be a warrior but I am no slouch either, and my trident has a reach bonus. I can attack over the Paladin just as well as the Fighter if need be."

"Agreed," Cerea said. "Meanwhile, Miia, would you mind taking the back of the line?"

"The back? Why the back?"

"In case someone sneaks up on us," Rachnera said, as if it was the most obvious thing. "Do you really want poor Papi to be in the back when something jumps her and kills our mage first?"

"W-well no, but why can't someone else go in the back?" If she was in the back she might miss out on the chance to be the first to rescue the Prince!

"You're our only other melee type," Cerea said. "This is a necessary stratagem to ensure our victory."

Miia fumed, but had to admit they were right. "Oh alright fine. I'm in the back. But soon as there's trouble I'm moving forward."

"Of course. And I guess that puts you... here." The pieces were finally finished, arranged in a neat little line. Like baby ducks. Or lemmings about to be lead to the slaughter.

"So the order is... Cerea, Suu, Mero, Rachnera, Papi, Miia. Right?"

They all nodded in unison.

The CM could see they were as ready as they were ever going to be. "Well alright then. Let's get started."

* * *

As they'd suspected, the tunnels were trapped.

A poisoned spike here, a swinging blade there, a pit trap that thankfully Cerea had been able to save against. And those were some of the tamer dangers. Though at least Papi had been able to disarm the magical rune they'd nearly tripped right over. That was a nasty one. None of them were terribly lethal, but slowly but surely they began to chip away at Cerea's hitpoints, even despite the healing of Suu's Druid. And despite what they'd discussed earlier, Cerea was a mediocre healer at best, so she decided to save her meager abilities for a truly dire occasion. Suu wasn't the best either, as a Druid a lot of her spells were nature based, and not all given to healing. Even so, she managed to retain a few for later. And Rachnera's Cleric was almost fully charged, which would be good, because likely they were going to need her.

They went down some dead ends and half-buried tunnels as their Catacombs Master continued to narrate.

"Another dead end," he announced, trying to ignore how Lala glanced their way at the word. She was quietly reading in the corner while they played, but had taken a half-hearted interest in the game while they played.

"Damnit, we have to double back and try the other way," Miia said. "Flip the marching order and let's get going, double time."

"We shouldn't rush," Cerea said. "That last cave-in nearly crushed us, and we also need to get out of here in the end."

"But the Prince is in danger," Miia replied. Mero nodded emphatically at her side.

"We have to hurry."

"We're no good to him dead. Let's try this next corridor," Rachnera suggested, pointing it out.

"Why that way?"

She pointed to some scrap paper she'd been drawing on. "I'm tracking which ways are working and which lead to dead ends. There's a pattern down here. If I'm right... this may be the last little bit we have to go... but there's something odd..."

"Odd?" asked Papi. "What's odd?"

Rachnera rubbed a clawed hand against her chin. "No guards. We haven't had a single enemy approach us down here."

"The King and Queen assured us this path would be clear," the mermaid at her side replied.

She shook her head. "This is lackadaisy even for the Wicked Queen... I don't like it."

"As you turn down the next corridor," the CM narrated. "You come across a heavy steel door at the end of the corridor. It looks newer than the rest of the catacombs, and the edges around it are freshly bricked up. Likely, it is a newer addition."

"That must be the way into the castle," Miia exclaimed.

"Guessing trouble's on the other side of this door," Cerea said, nodding over at Rachnera. "We ready for it?"

Everyone quickly agreed they were, and Centorea boldly announced, "I open the door with sword in hand and prepare for a fight."

The CM nodded. "Past the door is an open room which looks like the center of the catacombs, with a higher ceiling nearly double the height of your Paladin, and a number of exits leading off to other tunnels. But it is in the center of the room that draws your attention, for there is something there."

"Uh-oh, looks like we got combat," Miia said. "Fighter draws her sword as well."

"Fight!" cheered Papi.

"Fight!" echoed Suu.

Smiling at their enthusiasm, their Catacombs Master wondered if this next revelation would fill them with awe or dread. "In the center of the room is a great beast with the body of a lion, though of much greater size and ferocity. Great bat-like wings extend from its back, beating the air and stirring up a warm breeze that washes over you all. In place of its tail is a writhing serpent. It bears two frontward heads to compliment the snake one in back, that of a goat with great curved horns and a snarling saber-toothed lion beside it. The latter gives a ferocious snarl as it spots its next meal... you."

He let out what he hoped might be a convincing mighty roar, but it ended up sounding like a Wookie being strangled. None of the girls were terribly impressed, but Kimihito felt he'd made his point.

As it was, however, most of them had no idea what they were going up against, and began to confer quietly. Cerea, on the other hoof, identified it immediately. She'd given only a cursory glance through the Monsters Manual for potential enemies they might fight, but given the name of the game, this one had been without question one to study up on.

"It's a Chimera," she said, feeling a sense of foreboding settle in her stomach. A gnawing sense of fear. Chimeras were big, and they were tough, and they one of the most dangerous creatures in the game. They were very fortunate such horrible abominations did not exist in the real world. At least, so far as they knew.

This might be the one encounter they didn't walk away from.

* * *

 **Authors Notes:  
** Not the most conventional of ways to disarm traps, but a hell of a lot more fun to write.

Come on, with a name like that you weren't expecting one? That's like playing Dungeons and Dragons and never seeing an actual Dragon. **BOR- _ing_! ** Admittedly, I also picked Chimera as my choice of both game name and creature encounter for different reasons. Since I didn't want the Monster girls fighting actual monsters, the Chimera struck me as one of the very least likely characters to show up in Daily Life with Monster Girls as yet another cute lady/love interest for the protagonist.

And if the manga's author does suddenly have one show up? I'll eat my hat.


	6. Three Heads

Kimihito picked up from behind his screen one of his old lead figurines, setting it down on the board in front of them. Technically, the figure was that of a medium-sized dragon, and a greenish-yellow one at that, but hopefully their imaginations could fill in the blanks and add to it some extra heads and a different coat. He couldn't exactly take the time to paint or buy a new one, after all. He was pretty sure they didn't even make ones like that anymore. And after all, a little imagination was part of the fantasy fun for a good game of C&C.

"This'll be the Chimera," he said. "Please add your figurines in the marching order they were in?"

They did so obediently, stretching them out by the entrance to the catacomb and preparing to take on their first big monster together. The excitement was palpable, half of them were leaning forward in their seats for a better look.

"And... let's roll for initiative," he said.

The girls picked up their ten-sided die and began shaking them, conferring amongst themselves as they prepared to roll.

"Okay, what do we do?" asked Cerea.

"Fireball! Fireball!" Papi cheered.

"Yeah, fireball! Fireball!" and of course Suu was cheering right alongside her.

 _We might need to get those two matching cheerleader outfits, complete with pom-poms_ , Miia mused. Aloud, she said, "We'll have to go on the attack," she said. "Cerea's Paladin and my Fighter in front, spellcasters in back."

"What, like every other fight we've had?" the centaur at her side said. "I think not. This is but one foe. We surround and take it out from all angles. Flanking is a time honored strategy for a reason."

"Yes and you know all about _flank_ ing, don't you, miss fat flank?" Rachnera said with a toothy grin.

"What was that?" Cerea demanded hotly.

Thankfully their dice results came in before they could trade further insults (or come to blows) and they settled back into the rhythm of the game. The Paladin went first, Fighter, Druid, Chimera, Bard, Wizard, and finally Cleric came next.

"When it's our turn, you can move left, Cerea," Miia said. "And I'll take right. That way we can..."

"Girls, no strategizing please, you can't call a time out with the monster to discuss what you're doing..."

"Sorry," his players all chorused.

"Okay, so who was first?"

Turns out it was Cerea, who charged her Paladin forward and past the Chimera, to take up a better position towards its rear, where it would be more vulnerable (she hoped). Miia went next and angled along its other side to give it even more difficulty, essentially splitting its attention between the two of them. They were following their strategy to give them the flanking advantage, which was very smart all things considered. A seasoned group of adventurers could not have done better.

Next came...

"Suu?"

The little slime girl moved her Druid forward and sideways, out of the way of the others, but near enough for what came next. "Cast barkskin spell on Rachnera's Cleric," she said. She even reached across the table to brush her tentacle against the spider lady's shoulder, simulating the touch requirement the spell had. "Now her skin is hard like bark."

"Bleck, why would I want something like that?" asked the arachnid woman.

"It gives improved armor," Kimihito explained. "+3 to AC. And good thing too, for it's the _Chimera_ 's turn."

He took a moment to determine just what to do, and ultimately settled on having his Chimera split its attention between Miia and Chimera. He could justify it because they were closets, but really he was doing it because they had the most hitpoints and could survive anything he threw at them. He hoped. Turning the figure around to face them, he grabbed up a pair of twenty-sided die. Two attack rolls later, he breathed out a sigh of relief. The one against Cerea had missed entirely, and the damage against Miia's Fighter was from the goat head. It's damage was negligible. Even so, he rolled the appropriate die and announced her damage. She took it reasonably well.

That was good. It was going to get worse before it got better. Much worse.

"... and the snake's tail can't reach anyone from where it is, so no attacks for that. Who was next?"

The fuschia mermaid, apparently. "I start up a rousing melody to embolden my comrades to gather all of their courage and strength and..."

"... S-O-W, great, we got it," Rachnera interrupted, using the acronym for the ' _Song of War_.' "Great. I'm next. I move into position... right about here should do."

Most of the others followed her example, spreading out around the Chimera, but leaving a clear line for their front line fighters to take it on. A new round of initiative started up, and Miia beat out the others with a rare quick initiative. One of the fastest she'd rolled yet. Unfortunately, she just as quickly missed with a roll of a two on her attack, which she glared down at for ruining her hit.

"Goddamn dice," she muttered. She glared at the multi-faceted stones.

Cerea went up to bat next, and seemed to have better luck than the lamia.

"Sixteen!" she declared triumphantly, almost rearing back and kicking her front legs in joy. "Plus two for strength, that's... eighteen. That's gotta be a hit! Right?!"

"... well, you do hit," Kimihito agreed. "Unfortunately, your weapon... uh... well... _bounces_ off the armored hide of the Chimera.

Her expression fell almost comically fast, her pointed ears drooping as she looked down at the board in complete shock.

"I'm afraid only magical weapons can pierce its hide," he explained. He probably shouldn't have told them that, but they'd just look it up soon anyway, or else spend the time trying to figure out what weapons could and couldn't hurt a Chimera. This was a given. But it still came as a shock to some of them.

"WHAT?!"

"Oh no, that's right," Mero suddenly remembered. "It was covered in the manual. Chimeras aren't hurt by non-magical weapons."

"But none of us have..."

Six lights went off above their heads... as Kimihito flicked the light switch beside his seat. It was starting to get dark out. And then five of those heads swiftly swung around, locking the Lamia in their sights.

"My +1 Sword!" Miia said, catching on instantly. "The one I got from the previous encounter! I can totally use it to take out the Chimera!"

"If you can hit it."

"What do the rest of us do in the meantime?" asked Mero. "We can't do any damage. And we can't just leave them to fight alone."

"Run interference," Cerea suggested, already prepared to do just that. "If we can keep its focus on us we can give Miia the best chance to kill it."

"No reason we all have to play at being decoy," Rachnera snapped. "I have a plan of my own, thank you."

"Care to share?"

"Not really, no."

"Alright, new round. Roll initiative."

Dice rolled and another round of combat commenced. With the fight now much more one-sided than before, it was forcing the characters to think on their feet and come up with creative ways to fight their triple-headed foe. Some were having better success than others.

"Papi casts magical missiles!" the excited harpy cried.

She'd been spending most of the previous rounds looking through her spellbooks for something useful, and finally settled on the perfect spell for the occasion. In the mind's eye, six magical glowing arrows appeared and unerringly slammed into the Chimera's hide, earning another roar of pain from the triple-headed beast. Sure, the damage was minimal even with Papi's Mage being a reasonable level, as the spell was only first level. But at least it was a way to cause damage. Her dagger certainly wouldn't work. And unlike last time, she'd taken into account the fallout of a fireball spell. She was thinking ahead, and more importantly, remembering.

 _That'll do, harpy_ , Kimihito thought. _That'll do_.

"Next?"

"Mine!" Miia declared, rolling her die twenty. A more reasonably number came up, but alas, it still counted as a miss.

"... just barely," the Catacombs Master assured her, even as she fumed angrily. "Okay, who was next... Suu, wasn't it?"

"Suu wants to cast a spell," the sweet slime girl said, holding up an open book. "But I don't know how to say it," she added, her central antennae forming a rough kanji of the word in question.

Fortunately, her CM recognized it. Glancing up from her spot nearby, the headless Dullahan Lala seemed to recognize it as well. "Oh yeah, I know that one. Never did find out how to say it myself. Okay, so you cast it... on your staff?"

"Mmhmm!" She nodded in agreement, though her choice of targets for the spell was rather limited.

"It glows briefly and then seemingly reverts to normal."

"What's this spell you're casting?" asked a puzzled Cerea.

Suu passed the book to her as she explained. "It makes non-magical staves and clubs into magical staves and clubs."

"Temporarily," Kimihito nodded. "But yeah, that's the jist of it."

"So next turn Suu can attack," Papi said. "Sweet!"

"Alright, but for now that spell ends her turn, and we move to... Mero. Mero?"

"Still singing a song to boost morale," she replied. "But I'll move my figure... here... and try to sing very loudly so I can get the Chimera's attention."

He nodded.

"Then on to..."

* * *

There was another round of initiative and mixed results before Kimihito called a quick break from his CM duties to get up and stretch. As well as refill his bowl of snacks and get another soda. To be honest he hadn't been quite sure the girls would get this far, but they were proving to be very quick learners of the game. A week ago most of them didn't even know what to make of a die that had more than six sides (or even less). Now they were slinging them around like they were going out of style. It was oddly heartwarming.

They'd come to the human world to learn about the humans ways, but this was one of the first times he'd felt they were truly having fun doing so. All of them, all together. And with him, no less. And a minimum (he figured it'd be a cold day in Hell when there was ZERO amount) of fighting between the girls. They had all come together.

And all over a silly C&C game.

Kimihito chuckled to himself as he took a swig of his drink and reclaimed his seat, ready to press on. The Chimera was going to be tough but the girls were tougher, and they just might have had what it took to take it down for good.

* * *

A few more rounds of combat followed, interrupted by the occasional refill of someone's drink or the pause for a bathroom break. The valiant adventurers worked to chip away at the Chimera's hitpoints and avoid the worst of its attacks, but sadly, they were badly outmatched by their lack of suitable weaponry. Miia and Suu were the only ones doing any substantial damage to the monster, leaving the others to simply take a beating, or in the case of Paladin and Cleric, patch them up for more of the same.

They were running out of options as they reached Miia's next strike, however. She'd only managed a few glancing blows against the Chimera, but she felt good about this one as she picked up her die twenty and employed a trick her Darling had taught her to focus all of her luck on it. Cupping it in her hands, she blew on it, like blowing a kiss to a lover... before rolling it across the table.

Result: nineteen.

"Oh that's gotta be a hit!" she said, overjoyed at her change in fortune.

Evidently he agreed, and she quickly rolled for damage.

"Five plus six. Eleven," Miia counted up the results. A damn good result, if not the best she could've done.

"Plus one," he reminded her. "Twelve total. Some damage, but still not enough to bring it down."

"Damnit, how many hitpoints does this damn thing have?!" she muttered.

"A lot," Papi said, missing the rhetorical nature of her question.

The lamia growled, nodding over to Rachnera. It was her turn, and she'd managed to barely scrape by the initiative before the Chimera. It attacked next, and some of them were in pretty dire straits if it did.

Thus, they were a bit puzzled when she picked up a die twenty and began to shake it in her grip. "Move one square closer to the Chimera, and attack."

"Attack? Lady Arachnera, are you mad?" asked Mero, glancing at her in alarm. "Your mace can't harm the Chimera, we already established..."

"I'm not trying to hit it with my mace," Rachnera explained with a devilish grin that Lala would have been proud of. "I try to touch it with my _bare hand_."

She rolled her die before they could stop her... and it rolled on a favorable number as the lilac-haired spider gave a wicked grin.

"Ah," Kimihito said, catching on. "In that case... you succeed."

The other girls were glancing back and forth between CM and player now, like they were watching a tennis match, glued to the action and unable to quite follow it, but sure they didn't want to miss a minute.

They were right. "And with that touch, my Cleric casts the HARM spell!" she crowed.

Kimihito nodded. "Instantly dealing..." he rolled some dice behind his screen. "... whew... more than a fair bit of damage."

"Enough to kill it?"

"... just barely. Thus, the Chimera gives an ungodly chorus of triple roars, then collapses onto the ground as its body seems to almost be ripped to pieces by Rachnera's Cleric. The spell finished it off."

"Woohoo!" cheered Miia.

"YES!" Cerea cheered.

"Loot the body!" Papi suggested.

"Loot! Loot!" Suu agreed.

Smiling at their enthusiasm, Kimihito had to burst their bubble. "Girls, it's a wild animal... mon-... mythological creature... beast... thingie. It doesn't have any pockets to pick or rummage through."

The two small girls seemed to deflate at this news.

"However, it did have a small treasure trove stashed in the corner you can get in on... all of you," he added.

A number of gold and silver coins they did their best to divide evenly, a few gemstones they had more trouble with. And one magical wand which Papi immediately claimed. No one fought her for it, none of them could use magical items like that except for her Wizard. She couldn't quite identify what it did or how to trigger it, but considering that her primary hope was a wand of fireballs, the others hoped she never found out until they were back in town.

"And that's that," Kimihito said. "So, pressing on?"

The others conferred with each other as he sat back and sipped at his soda.

"Maybe we should make camp," Miia suggested. "We're all hurting pretty bad, and low on spells."

"Just a bit further," Cerea said. "We can press on a little further, surely."

"Agreed," nodded the mermaid across the table from her. "Surely the worst of our opposition is behind us with the Chimera defeated. Let us press on and see if we cannot find our Prince before taking the chance to rest our weary cartilage."

"... bones. Its weary bones."

"Those too."

The others glanced amongst one another. It seemed they were all in agreement.

"Alright. A bit further," Miia agreed, turning to the gamemaster. "Same marching order."

* * *

Their continued search yielded empty results for the most part, a few corridors explored, a couple of rooms opened up. No more signs of the Black Knights but they did run across that one razor trap that chipped away at a few more of Rachnera's hitpoints, costing her one of her last 'cure light' spells. They were indeed about to give up when they started down the final tunnel in the Catacombs that finally opened up into the castle dungeons.

"Oh man, this is it!" Miia said in an excited whisper.

Mero nervously wringed her hands. "Our Prince... we're almost there!"

Their Catacombs Master narrated as they slipped into the dungeon. "The walls are dank and dark, and only the occasional torch lights the way. Most of the cells are empty, the iron doors stand open, but the one at the far end of the hall lies closed."

"Knock spell!" Papi said.

"Yeah, knock knock, motherfu-"

Kimihito cut off Rachnera before she could finish her phrase. "The barred door is unlocked by the spell. Not exactly knocked clean off its hinges, but it does swing open a quarter inch or so."

"I take point," Miia said immediately. "Open it all the way so we can get our Prince out."

"After you," Mero said diplomatically. Though it was because she half-suspected another trap.

"I'll guard the rear just in case," Cerea replied. "We might have more guards incoming."

Their Catacombs Master narrated. "The door swings open," he declared. "And inside you find..."

He paused, and they all leaned forward with baited breath...

"... an empty cell. Some rats are chewing on an old bone that's been left there from ages ago," he finished. He tried not to grin too openly, but damned if it wasn't difficult. He'd been wanting to spring this particular development on them almost from the beginning. And just in case someone tried to call foul on him, he had it in his notes hidden behind the CM screen. Circled in red.

"W-wha?!" said Miia, unable to wrap her brain around what he was saying.

"The Prince isn't here?!" they all seemed to exclaim at once.

"Oh no!" Mero proclaimed.

Kimihito smirked as he spelled out the little twist in their adventure:

"Sorry girls but... your Prince is in another castle..."

* * *

 **Authors Notes:  
** Cliché'd, perhaps, but I just had to pull that particular twist. Besides, with a story title like the one I picked, how could I not insert it into the story at some point?

Once more, I feel a need to defend that I know regular Chimeras, or even ones commonly found in most games (tabletop or otherwise) rarely act in the same manner as the one portrayed above. This was a storytelling decision, made to help move the plot along and provide maximum entertainment value.

Also, the spell Suu cast, that neither she nor Kimihito can pronounce, is Shillelagh. Like a dullahan, its part of celtic folklore, hence Lala recognizing it **.**


	7. Tall Dark Tower

"This might be a good time to call it quits," he said, glancing at the clock. "Wow, it's nearly after ten."

So caught up in the game they'd been playing all through the afternoon and into the early evening. The light had faded from the windows hours ago and they'd scarcely noticed.

"B-b-but what about the Prince?!" exclaimed Miia. "Darling, we have to go rescue him!"

"Rescue him! Rescue him!" chanted Papi and Suu.

He gave a tired smile at their enthusiasm. "Girls, look, its late and I'm tired... and we're not going to finish the adventure tonight," Kimihito explained. "Besides, your characters are pretty beat up, do you really want to press on and get killed? Then nobody can save the Prince."

His appeal to their noble hearts (and romanticism) seemed to work, but they did so begrudgingly concede defeat. Some more readily than others.

"Your characters can spend eight hours resting to recover spells, and provided you each take turns at a watch, you'll all be refreshed afterwards," he added, throwing them a metaphorical bone.

"And healed?" asked the lamia girl to his left.

"Somewhat, but we can use our remaining healing spells now, sleep, then have more to use when we wake up," Rachnera added. "Sounds like a plan."

Kimihito rolled some dice quickly. "No random encounters," he announced. "Your sleep is uninterrupted. Tomorrow morning we'll pick up right here, but for now... I'm heading to bed."

There was an intake of breath, and he quickly added, "Alone." This was met by some faint groans of disappointment, but he had been fortunate so far. Ever since the night of the full moon, none of the girls had tried to interrupt his sleep time. Which was fortunate for Kimihito Kurusu. He doubted he'd be half as capable of handling all these lovely liminal ladies if he was running on only fumes every day.

His statement of sleep was quickly echoed by the others. Some of whom gathered up their stuff, others who left it lying haphazardly around the table and the floor for tomorrow's gameplay. And so they slithered, cantered, skittered, slid or rolled their way to their respective rooms and beds to await the passing of the evening and the coming of dawn.

Tomorrow was another day of adventure. They still had a Prince to save and they intended to do it. Come Hell or high water.

* * *

The next morning almost everyone slept in, given it was Sunday they weren't in any hurry to rise from their slumber. But eventually they all awoke, showered, dressed, fixed themselves up as pretty as you please, and made their way back to the table and the game. After breakfast, of course. No sense gaming on an empty stomach.

Kimihito took charge and reminded them of the events of last night, providing a quick recap of their progress and mission in case any of them had forgotten. Then inquired what they would be doing once the Fighter, Mage, Paladin, Druid, Bard and Cleric broke came in the morning.

"First Papi wants to identify her wand," the blue-haired harpy said. She was twirling a pencil in her hand like it was the item in question. "Papi got her spell back so she wanna use it."

"Well, alright, your spell reveals the wand is actually a Wand of Clairvoyance."

"What's clairvoyance?"

"Oh, it's a spell to see beyond your range of sight," Mero said. "Like, peering into other rooms or parts of the world, without ever going there."

"Could be useful," Rachnera nodded. "Keep it safe, Mage."

"You got it!"

"Anybody else have anything they need to get set right away?" he inquired, glancing around the table.

"Just sharpening my sword before battle, as my Paladin does every morning," said Cerea solemnly.

"And my Bard needs to get her harp tuned up," Mero added.

"Well you get those things done with no problem. Okay, technically what I said wasn't true, obviously the Prince is here somewhere, just not here in this dungeon like you were lead to believe. The Prince -is- somewhere in the castle. I'll tell you that much. But the rest you have to figure out yourselves."

"This time we're ready," Miia said with a grin. She turned to pat the head of the blue-haired harpy at her side. "Take it away, Papi."

"Papi casts Magic Seeing Eye Thingie Spell!"

Kimihito raised an eyebrow, positive that wasn't the spells official name. He glanced at Miia.

"Clairvoyance," she clarified.

"With the wand."

"Ah. Well alright then. Papi sees a number of new locations open up to her, down the remaining tunnel you didn't explore yesterday, and down a hallway past that."

"What's there? Is it the Prince?"

He shook his head. "No, but you see instead the royal chambers, and within, the Wicked Queen and a pair of Black Knights. Beyond them is a spiral stairway leading up, but your spell's range fizzles before it can go any further. To do anymore exploring you'll need to go there for yourselves."

"Then that's where we're going."

* * *

Finding the tunnel in question wasn't hard, and likewise slipping out of the Catacombs below the castle and into the castle itself. Guard patrols were light, it seemed they had ascribed to the philosophy of watching the outside of the castle, rather than worry about who might've already gotten inside. They only spotted a few, and easily avoided them as they took a circular route towards the chamber Papi had seen. It seemed to be a large room just beneath the tallest tower in the Wicked Queens castle.

Mero took this as a good sign. "In lot of fairy tales, the Prince... or... well the captive... is held in the tallest tower far out of reach. That must be where he's being held prisoner."

"Sounds good to me," Miia said, moving her figure into place in front of the door. "But that means the Wicked Queen is in our way. What say we break down the door and kill her?"

"Seconded," Rachnera voted with a grin.

"What's our plan?"

"Open the door, spread out," Cerea instructed. "Papi, I know I'm going to regret saying this, but fireball as soon as you get a clear line of attack. Get as many of them as possible in one go. Then and only then we'll move in for melee. Sound good?"

"Sounds awesome!" Miia cheered. "Time to rescue us a prince!"

"Anyone have armor or protection spells, cast 'em now. Mero, start singing soon as the door is open. No sense letting them know we're coming."

"Right."

"Everyone set?"

Nods all around responded to her question. Every monster girl at the table had her game face on.

" **GO**!"

* * *

The door was flung open and the dice rolled across the table as initiative was seized by the brave adventurers. The Wicked Queen and her Black Knights were caught completely off guard, allowing for a free round of attacks from the heroes. Kimihito hadn't any remaining figurines suitable to use for them, but found an old chess set his parents had owned and made use of a pair of black pawns and a black queen to represent their final opponents. Flavor text filled in the rest of their details.

"Okay, whose got initiative?"

Apparently Mero did, and she maneuvered into position and out of harm's way, singing a war chant to empower her comrades and raise their spirits. One which sounded suspiciously like a pop song he'd heard on the radio the other day. But it improved their rolls, so it didn't really matter what the content was.

Suu went next, and also shifted sideways to give more room to their fights, going after the leftmost Knight. She couldn't attack yet, but neither could he.

Next was the harpy. "Papi?"

"Fireball!" she said. Then, very carefully using her feathered hands, indicated the area she was aiming at. Unlike previous times, there would be no collateral damage, except to the Black Knights caught on the periphery of the spells effects. And the primary target would be the Wicked Queen. No one in her party was going to get so much as singed.

She was definitely getting better at this.

"Alright, sounds good... roll for damage."

Papi did so with such eagerness she accidently rolled the wrong die. Which if had been correct would have spelled certain doom for the Wicked Queen, her Dark Knights, and most of her castle. Re-rolling the correct dice, she arrived at the total of twenty-two. A reasonable amount, and more than enough to put the hurt on all of their enemies.

"First Dark Knight's move," Kimihito said. "After shaking off the fire damage he's going after Papi. Move him to... here."

He was indeed close, but he'd evidently made a fatal mistake. Or their CM was purposefully taking it easy on them. Cerea was nearby, and in a straight line no less. And another lovely coincidence: it was her turn.

"Charge," she whispered fiercely, a glint in her eye. "Charge the blaguard and defend our Wizard!"

A twenty-sider hit the table, and Cerea swung with her Paladin's sword. "SMITE EVIL!"

He nodded as her roll turned into a decisive hit, and between her ability to damage evil-doers and the damage she started with, coupled with the raw strength only a centaur was capable of, well, in the Catacomb Masters own words:

"... there won't be enough of this guy left to fill a coffin."

"Woohoo! One down!" cheered Miia.

"Wicked Queen's turn," Kimihito announced. "And uh... you do all remember she's a spellcaster, right?"

"... uh-oh," Rachnera said.

"She's actually a level nine, and she's casting... meteor swarm."

Easily one of the most destructive spells in the game, it made Papi's fire _ball_ s look like fire _cracker_ s. And worse, it was over a much wider field of play. Virtually everyone in the room was hit, knocking down the hit points of Cerea and Miia into the yellow and putting Rachnera and Suu and Mero into the red. But worst was what happened to Papi, who teetered on the brink of life with a single hitpoint left. A strong gust of wind would kill her Mage now.

"Help please! Papi doesn't want to die!" she exclaimed, flapping her wings excitedly and nearly knocking over everyone's character sheets.

Some makeshift paperweights quickly kept them on the table, as they went through their options. And fortunately, Rachnera was close at hand to offer help.

"Cure moderate," she said, warranting the more advanced version of her token spell. Papi needed it.

"Restoring... Papi's mage to full," Kimihito said after the die roll.

"Papi will love you forever!" the excitable harpy declared.

"You can repay me later," Rachnera said, having already decided on a few new techniques she wanted to try on her after the game. "Right now, take down that stupid Queen bitch before she kills us all. You have anymore offensive spells?"

"Two," Papi said. "Magic Missile and Lightning Bolt."

"Well light her up already!"

"Meanwhile, let's the rest of us see if we can't wear down that protection she's got on," Mero added. "If not, we die in the name of our Prince!"

"Is he even _our_ Prince? We haven't rescued him yet," Cerea mused.

"Semantics," the romantic mermaid waved dismissively with a webbed hand.

* * *

Another round followed, and another after that.

Between Miia and Mero wailing on him, they managed to bring down the second Black Knight, impaling him on a sword and a trident and ensuring he'd never be threatening innocents again. Taking down the remaining opponent, the Wicked Queen, proved more difficult. Cerea charged her once her turn came around again, but her weapon was repulsed by a glowing shield of energy. A great way to bump her Armor up without actually wearing full platemail. Subsequent attacks from Suu and Rachnera weren't much better. And just when they thought they had her cornered, she teleported herself to another part of the room.

In essence, resetting the board and making them fight uphill all over again.

"Shame none of us brought bows," Miia said, moving her lamia Fighter into position for a charge. It was the further she could go, and she felt uncomfortably vulnerable even with the Wicked Queen so far away. Spellcasters didn't play fair.

She knew that, but it was different when it wasn't Papi or Suu or Rachnera helping her out. This one was fighting _against_ them.

"Cerea?"

"Lay on Hands," replied the centaur lady. "Should restore my hitpoints to almost full."

A quick roll of the die confirmed such. "So it does."

The others quickly moved into position, but following the teleport, the Wicked Queen was primed in position for another round of attacks. She even took the time for an evil laugh. Poor Kimihito couldn't quite manage an evil cackle, but he tried for their sake.

"A-ha-... -ha... hahah... ha!"

Silence reigned at the table.

Suu softly coughed into her slimy fist.

"Okay she's casting the Magic Missile spell," their Catacombs Master finally said. "She gets five bolts, so... one for each of you, minus Papi."

"Why minus Papi?" asked Miia darkly.

A nervous drop of sweat descended down his neck. "Uh... I rolled it?" he said, making a show of rolling dice behind his CM screen. Miia continued to glare at him, ruby eyes cast into a gloomy stare, but she didn't make a further protest as he rolled for the missiles. Minimal damage with it all spread out, but with no way to dodge or deflect such attacks, each of the girls sadly crossed off their hitpoints with pencil in hand and tallied up their new total.

That ended the round.

And with that...

Kimihito groaned and stood up. "Stretch break," he said. The other girls quickly followed his lead, breaking away for drinks, snacks, or use of the facilities. Miia alone remained, glaring down at the black chess piece representing the Wicked Queen like it was her mortal enemy. And so far as she was concerned, in her current mindset, it was. It was keeping her Fighter from her Prince. The same way Miss Smith tried to keep her from her precious Darling with her rules and regulations and government restrictions. Well, cutting red tape wasn't nearly as easy as rolling die. So while she might not have been able to do much in the real world... in the fantasy world of Catacombs and Chimeras... maybe... just maybe... she could seize her destiny in her own two hands and her tightly coiled tail and win. Once and for all!

Reclaiming his chair, the CM glanced around as the other girls settled in comfortably. "Okay, what now? Another round of combat?"

"Sounds good," Rachnera replied. "We don't exactly have much else we can do."

"We could retreat," Suu suggested. The others glanced at her with some surprise. It was an unusual suggestion, but it _was_ an option. Trust the adorable little slime to think outside the box.

"I don't feel like giving up just yet," the mermaid by her side said. Mero was determined for either a happy ending or a tragic demise, and both required her moving forward. "We should stay and see this through to the end."

"We're not giving up," Miia agreed. "I take another swing at the Wicked Queen with my +1 sword! She's going DOWN!"

* * *

Several rounds of combat later, and things were starting to look dire. Well, _more_ dire. The Wicked Queen was wearing them down, and her spell arsenal was proving impossible to counter in terms of versatility and raw power. They were more outmatched than they'd been against the Chimera.

"And that brings me down to... yick. Three hitpoints," Miia lamented. "One more good hit and I'm dead."

"The same," Cerea said solemnly. "A mere four. And I'm out of healing spells. Papi? How are you on spells?"

"One Knock spell left," she replied sadly, gazing at the lead figurines sadly. If she just had another fireball...!

"What about Suu and Rachnera?"

The little slime girl sadly shook her head. "All out."

"I have two cure lights," the spider-woman admitted. "But that won't do us much good if that bitch gets off another Meteor Swarm."

"She probably doesn't have another one," Mero interjected. "It's a very high level arcane spell. She probably just had the one."

"Which still stung like a moth-..."

A throat cleared before she could finish her sentence. "Anyway! Another round, roll for initiative?" he requested, rolling behind his screen. "Queen rolls a two," Kimihito reported.

"Six!"

"Nine."

"Ten. Ouch."

"Three.

"And... another three for Miia... okay, you won initiative... just after the Queen finishes casting her spell. Fortunately, it's a protection spell."

"Oh man, that's not good," said Rachnera. "Now she's even harder to hit."

"How much harder?"

The arachna quickly did some checking in the manual. "Since she probably just used the Armor spell... you'd need at least a nineteen or twenty to hit her now."

"It's the Fighters turn. What do you do?"

"Attack!" she said quickly, reaching for the twenty-sider and blowing on it for good luck. The lamia lady bit her lip, nervously shaking the die in her hands. If she didn't win initiative, the Wicked Queen might indeed start to kill them all with her next attack. One by one, which was somehow worse. They needed to shut her down hard.

She was the only thing left between Miia and her Darli-... the Prince. She had to succeed!

Miia tossed the die, covering her eyes, unable to bear looking. Everyone else around the table, however, leaned forward for a closer look as the multicolored die settled against a bottle of soda...

* * *

 **Authors Notes:  
** Cliffhangar! Muwahahaha. Mine is an evil laugh.


	8. Your Reward

Miia peeked from behind her hands, gazing down at the colorful, twenty-sided die she'd just rolled, resting beside a lead figurine and a soda bottle. A two and a zero smiled up at Miia as she finally raised her gaze and opened her eyes fully.

"Natural Twenty!" cheered Mero.

"Woohoo! Crit-i-cal!" yelled Papi.

"Crit-i-cal!" Suu mirrored her, but she looked even more pleased with Miia's result.

Kimihito smiled, nodding at the die. "Definitely a hit. And damage?" he asked mildly.

Miia quickly picked up the appropriate die and tossed them onto the table. Numbers quickly added up to an impressive amount, and Kimihito checked the paper he had behind the Masters screen. Even with the protection spell she'd used the Wicked Queen was done for. A quick swipe of his pencil and the Wicked Queen's hitpoints had been reduced to zero. With a dramatic tip, he knocked over the chess piece representing her. He could almost picture in his mind the dark sorceress howling in defeat as she died. And tried to ignore the part of his mind that mused it sounded a lot like Miss Smith.

"Your final blow is more than she can bear, and she erupts into black smoke which quickly dissipates in the air. The Wicked Queen... has been vanquished."

* * *

"Woohoo! We won!" cheered Papi.

"Hooray!" Centorea clapped her hands together and very nearly rearing back on her hind legs, pleased beyond measure.

Rachnea scooped up Mero out of her chair for a full-body hug and for once, the mermaid wasn't protesting in the slightest as she was swung around, nearly slapping Suu in the face with her tail. Everyone was elated. They'd been through a lot, gone through beasts and burdens, but they'd finally succeeded in their adventure. The Prince was saved, evil was vanquished, and the fantasy realm they'd constructed in their heads had been saved.

Plus, it had been great fun.

"Oh man that was awesome!" Miia said, high-fiving the centaur lady beside her. "We totally ruled!"

"You ruled the most!" Papi declared, jumping up to wrap her feathered arms around Miia's neck. "Miia totally killed the Wicked Queen with her +1 Sword! Papi is super jealous! The sword rules!"

"So does its wielder," Kimihito agreed. Miia blushed, her cheeks turning as red as her scales.

"Rachnera rules also," interjected Suu. "She killed the Chimera."

Waving her clawed fingers dismissively, the spider lady preened. "Yes, yes, please go on. I enjoy praise."

"It was a team effort. I'd say we've all earned our keep for part of the adventure," Cerea agreed, reaching to either side of her and hugging the harpy and slime at her sides to her ample chest.

"Agreed, it could have gone far worse," Mero said, clasping her hands in front of her. "We could yet have all been killed, and the Prince consigned to a life forever more as a hideous slug. What a woeful fate to befall him."

There was a beat, as if the realization sunk in, and the mermaid's lovely face adopted an almost comically expression of 'what had I done?' that nearly made Kimihito burst into laughter despite his best effort not to.

"... is it too late for that to still happen?" she asked modestly.

"That ain't happenin'," Miia said proudly. "Wicked Queen just got herself dusted by my Fighter."

"You're right about that, looks like you did it," Kimihito agreed. "The Wicked Queen is no more."

"What about the rest of her forces?" asked Cerea.

He explained via narration. "After the Wicked Queen is defeated word travels quickly throughout her castle and her realm. Her forces quickly either surrender or escape into the surrounding woods," he explained. "Most are never seen again. Leaving you free to explore the castle to your heart's content."

"Then we want to hit the tall tower first," Rachnera said. "That's where the Prince must be being held."

He nodded. "Indeed he is. And he's most grateful for the rescue. That is, of course, if you can get him out of his cell."

"Oh that's right," Miia remembered. "We should've searched the Wicked Queen for the keys to his cell."

"Or one of her guards," Mero added. "Or maybe it's in here somewhere?"

"Papi casts Knock!" the harpy girl cheerfully said, waving her hands as if actually spellcasting. "Whoosh!"

Kimihito smiled at her enthusiasm. "And like before, the cell door is opened with no fuss. The Prince steps out, shaken and disheveled from his captivity, perhaps a bit dirtier than he might otherwise be, but in good spirits. He says ' _Thank you for your kindly rescue, brave adventurers_ ' and greets you all."

"And I think that's quest completion," Miia said.

"Goal reached!" Papi cheered.

"Oh, and I guess it's time to return his ring," the lamia Fighter remembered, miming the motion with her ring finger and offering the invisible jewelry to Kimihito. "For you, my Prince."

He accepted it with a bemused expression, and tried not to wince as the other girls started glaring daggers at Miia, miming putting the ring onto his finger. Making sure it was his _index_ finger and not his _ring_ finger. No sense sending further mixed messages to the entire household. He wanted to sleep secure tonight, not worry about being murdered and/or married in his sleep.

"Well then... I assume you all want to escort him back to the Enchanted Kingdom and his King and Queen parents?"

Nods from all around the table.

"We're not going to have another Random Encounter again, are we?" asked Suu innocently.

He shook his head. "No, no, the adventure is over... you make it back completely without incident. In fact, by the time you arrive, the entire palace is preparing for you with a royal precession. Trumpets, cheering, flower petals... the works."

"Wow, a precession, all for us," Mero gushed, brushing a hand through her pink locks. "I wish my Bard had time to properly clean up before she presented herself before the King and Queen. She needs time to wash her hair, change her clothes, freshen up..."

"Who cares how we look?" replied a snarky lamia. "Its battle damage, we look 20% cooler this way! At least!"

"I suppose we just march up right to the King and Queen with their Prince in tow," Cerea said, nodding in agreement. Then, her cheeks flushed a little. "He, uhm... he's permitted to uh... the Prince may ride my Paladin... uhm... if he so chooses."

Kimihito flushed a little at that as well, full well remembering how Cerea had described riding a centaur when they'd first met. And the cultural implications involved in such. It wasn't hard to imagine she was picturing the same sort of outcome in the game she wanted to have in real life. "He uh... he politely declines, but is most grateful for your offer," he managed to say, and without his voice trembling too much either. "But he'll just walk alongside you all."

The mermaid politely cleared her throat. "So! We're brought before the King and Queen?"

"Ah, yes, of course," their CM said after regaining his line of thought. "They welcome you back with open arms."

"Finally, a bit of respect," Miia said.

"Hail the conquering Heroes," Suu agreed.

"Oooh, that must mean its award time," Rachnera said with a grin, rubbing her sticky fingers together anxiously. "We could get lots of gold for all this."

"I wonder what we're gonna get?" asked Papi.

"The King and Queen promised us a reward," Suu said. "Maybe some magic items?"

"Maybe the Prince will reward us as well."

"I'd rather take the Prince as a reward!"

Kimihito smiled knowingly. He'd been expecting this much at least since yesterday, and prepared accordingly.

Again taking on the voice of the Catacombs Master, he described their journey home. "With the Prince safely in your company you return to the throne room of the Enchanted Castle, and he into the loving arms of his mother and father, the King and Queen. They of course, after ensuring their darling boy is alright, lavish you with material wealth of gold and silver..." here he paused, handing a sticky note with the exact amount to Miia. "... in their gratitude for saving their son and the realm."

She quickly showed the others, some of whom looked giddy at the promise of treasure. Rachnera in particular was rubbing her hands in anticipation of just what she could buy with that much gold.

"I could buy all new armor with this," she said gleefully. "Plate stuff, not that chain garbage I had to settle on before."

"Its not all yours," Suu protested. "Suu wants her cut."

"Fine, fine, we'll divide it evenly. Along with the spoils. Cerea, you still got those weapons we've been collecting off of Dark Knights?"

"Sure do. Safe and sound."

"Well if we sell those..."

There was a polite clearing of throat from the Catacombs Master. "The Prince, however, wishes to speak to each of you individually for your heroic efforts, and reward them appropriately," he went on. "So at this point I'd like each of you to leave the room and come in just one at a time. Your characters are going to be put up in rooms for the night in the castle, and the Prince will be visiting you there."

"One at a time?" asked Papi.

"One at a time," he repeated. "The idea is the Prince is going to meet each of your characters individually... when they're alone."

The more naïve monster girls didn't quite catch his choice of tone, but the others did, and felt their cheeks flush. Surely he couldn't be suggesting... and yet...

Anxious to find out just what sort of reward the Prince had in mind for them, the girls quickly left behind their Character Sheets and filed out of the room into the hallway. Some of whom were even dragged along by their more enthusiastic colleagues. Then, as instructed, each came in one after the other, speaking with Kimihito alone as the others waited, trying desperately to resist the urge to listen in. Eventually he'd gone through each and every one of them, and finally arrived at Miia.

Slithering into the room slowly, her tail flicked out to close the door behind her as she came to stand before Kimihito, who stood beside the table and wore a bedsheet draped around his shoulders. Evidently he was play acting at being the Prince for this particular bit of role play. Miia felt her cheeks grow hot and clasped her hands in front of her as she tried desperately to stop her heart from beating so fast. Wonderful fantasies flew through her head, each more wild than the last. And more than a few of them had her in something white and lacy and veiled...

"Thank you for coming, brave Fighter," Kimihito said gently, breaking up her thoughts and bringing her back to the here and now. She clasped a hand at her hip, as if holding her sheathed sword at her side. If he was going to roleplay, so could she.

"I could not have survived my captivity without the knowledge that you were coming to save me. You have saved me from a horrible fate and I could not be more grateful. The kingdom is in your debt, but more importantly so am I. I've thought long and hard on a proper reward for you, but in truth, only one seems to be appropriate."

He took her hands in hers, and Miia gazed up at her darling with baited breath as he leaned in and softly pressed his lips to hers.

"I know you risked much to rescue me, when you could have left me behind. So I thank you, Fighter."

If Miia blushed any more deeply she'd be mistaken for a cherry. She would not have been surprised if steam was erupting out of her ears at this very moment. For once in her life, words seemed to utterly fail her, and her whole body was quivering as she seemed to visibly struggle not to pounce on her Darling, rip off every last stitch of fabric covering his body, and ravage him until the end of the week.

She didn't even move as he gently pressed a hand to her cheek. "Can you go gather up the others? That's the final reward."

Blink.

"Huh?! Oh!" for a second she'd been so caught up in the story of the Human Prince and the Lamia Fighter she'd forgotten who she was. And it had been so beautiful...

Gently slapping herself back into reality, Miia nodded, squeezing her Darling's hands. As she slipped out of the room and told her housemates to get back in here, Kimihito paused momentarily to check the card he had in his hands.

It read:

 **Thank you for coming, brave [insert name here],  
** **I could not have survived my captivity without the knowledge  
that you were coming to save me. You have saved me from a  
horrible fate and I could not be more grateful. The kingdom is  
in your debt, but more importantly so am I. I've thought long  
and hard on a proper reward for you, but in truth, only one  
seems to be appropriate.  
** **(reward kiss here)  
** **I know you risked much to rescue me, when you could have  
left me behind.  
** **Thank you, [insert name here].**

A self-satisfied smirk slid over his face momentarily before he shucked his makeshift cloak and the grin with it, schooling his features into something more neutral so none of them would catch on to his little deception. He loved all the girls and he hated to show affection to any of them more than the others, but this, he figured, was a nice and neutral way to accomplish both goals.

If he was wrong, well, he was in for a world of pain that would make the Wicked Queen's end look pleasant.

* * *

One by one he'd repeated the final scene for each girl to enjoy their 'Happily Ever After' before giving Miia (the final girl) a request to call them all back. Once they'd filed back in and settled back at the table, Kimihito declared the game over, at least for now. But of course, that required a closing narration.

"In the morning your characters depart the Enchanted Kingdom for new adventure," he said in his Catacombs Master voice, low and ominous. "Perhaps following gossip and rumor of an uprising to the east, or beasts on the prowl on the borders. But you will always find the Enchanted Kingdom a haven to return to thanks to your brave deeds of daring. And of course, the favor of the royal family. But for now you hit the road, off on an entirely _new_ adventure, the horizon beckoning you ever onward."

He paused to let the words sink in, then smiled, relaxing and folding up his CM screen.

"Well, that was fun," he said with a smile. "I haven't had that much fun since high school... I don't think."

"Thank you for sharing this with us, Darling," Miia said, wrapping her arms around one of his and clinging to him. Her tail coiled around one of his ankles. "Can we play again sometime?"

"Another adventure?" he asked with a grin.

"That does sound like it would be fun," Mero agreed.

Rachnera and Cerea nodded in agreement. "We can save our character sheets for another time," the centaur lady said. "Store everything else away until we need it. You never know."

"Save it for a rainy day," Papi suggested. "Then we can play again! Papi can be wizard again! Fireball! Fireball!" she excitedly made the gesture for her spell again, making everyone laugh at her antics. Doubly so when Suu began to copy her.

"Fireball! Fireball!"

"Sounds like a plan then," Kimihito said, rolling up his sleeves and taking the important task of cleaning up the board, packing away the lead figurines, gathering up the dice (some would remain lost forever behind the couch and under the radiator) and storing away the books. Naturally, the girls helped by clearing off the table and packing away any garbage that had come from their gameplay, empty Chinese boxes and almost empty soda bottles and all manner of snack food wrappers. The fortune cookies they saved for later. Leaving their Catacomb Master free to return to his room and once more slide the re-closed lunch box back under his bed. Once more his days of 'Catacombs and Chimeras' had come to an end, and the fantasy and fun was over for the time being. Though now he had few more fond memories to look back on in the days to come, with the adventures he and his liminal housemates had shared.

And elsewhere, in the Enchanted Kingdom, the Fighter, Mage, Paladin, Bard, Cleric and their Prince settled into their own private Happily Ever After.

Until the next adventure...

* * *

 **Authors Notes:  
** Please review and favorite if you enjoyed. For this final chapter is YOUR reward.

IDarkShadowI on Deviantart was kind enough to work on some fanart related to this story. Though it doesn't capture a single scene, it definitely captures the essence of what 'Your Prince is in Another Castle' is all about. It should be up on their Deviantart Webpage in the very near future.

I'm primarily a fan of Cerea or Rachnera as the main ship for Kimihito (or his Lordship, or just plain ol' Honey) but recognize Miia had center stage of the monster harem, and they all seem to have equally good claims. I'm sure that's not coincidence on the part of the author either. So I came up with the idea to address such and yet not do so in one fell swoop with the Princes "reward" at the end of the story. He gives them each a little something without promising more. Hopefully, any major shipper can enjoy the humor and fun found here in favor of an exclusive romantic pairing.

And on that note, Happy Holidays, one and all. Enjoy your Christmas, your Hanukkah, your Kwanza, your Yuletide, your Winter Solstice, your Gift Day, your Hearths Warming Eve, or whatever else you may celebrate, or don't even, and just be happy with your friends and family anyway. Whether they be human, lamia, or Cthulu. Seriously, Cthulu needs some love too.


End file.
